I don’t like to criticize,
but, darling, do you think it wise
to wear those pants that emphasize
your long life of no exercise
and those big Macs with extra fries?
It is a choice I don’t advise,
for though you have such pretty eyes,
and face like poets eulogise,
your tucked-in blouse does not disguise
a figure Rubenesque in size.
It’s true Kim K. was aggrandised
by buttocks that were super-sized,
augmented and eroticized,
without a doubt romanticized
and surely over-publicized.
But still, dear, must you advertise
that derriere to all the guys?
Unless you’re set to capitalize
on spreading butt and super-thighs,
might I suggest a larger size?
The prompt today was criticize.
Haha… nice 🙂
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I love the rhythm and the rhyme scheme. Good one! 😀
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Nice lines 👍
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I love the rhythm and the rhyme scheme. Good one! 😀
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Thanks, thunder!!!
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nice….decent rhyme….
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Unfortunately this can be so true and we see gals out in exercise or yoga pants all the time….wait…uh, I am one of those gals. Dang.
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Me too upon occasion and the illustration looks great compared to me. Not sure whether the joke was on the teller or the tellee here!
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Ha.. great and intricate rhymes… 🙂
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Noticed a repeat rhyme in the last stanza, so made a slight change. There is still one repeat, but in stanzas so far away from each other that I’m letting it slide for now as I have a reading in a half hour. That’s cutting it close, no?
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If the complaints you get for this are slim
I’ll be quite surprised
Good take on an interesting prompt.
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Ha.
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So far no complaints, Linda.. slim or otherwise.
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Very well observed and brilliant rhymes 🙂
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Thanks, Jane.
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Thanks, Jane. Brilliant? Ahem.
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They shine 🙂
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Smiling and nodding here at your rhyming verses ~ Good one Judy ~
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Thanks, Grace. I love making you smile.
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Ah you made me chuckle!
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Much needed at this time in history!
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I love the cadence of the rhyme, and the not so subtle truthfulness couched in humor!
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Best way to do it. Common technique with native Americans.
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LOL… and I agree!!
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I thought this was going to arouse lots of controversy, but so far, readers seem to agree.
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Har, har, har! Loved reading it as I sat eating a garlic butter cheese biscuit hot out of the oven. Yes, thank you, I will have another.
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Well, whatever you do, change into loose slacks afterwards!!!!
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My kind of poetry and all using the same rhyming sound…just great!
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Well done meter and all on one rhyme sound. Your description almost makes me want to risk seeing a picture of her.
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I love the challenge of just using one rhyme in a poem. In this one I noticed I used two of the same words twice. Corrected one in an edit but left the other as the repetition was in stanzas far apart. I may eventually think of a way to remove the other repetition. It is fun. Like a puzzle.
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Sometimes repetition is good. I think you are referring to “size”. Repeating that word sort of emphasizes the content. But having an excuse to change something in a poem could generate a better one.
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Both welcome points…thanks, Frank.. I’ll have a look at it later..Distance somethimes helps.
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Love to hear you read this- sound lyrical. Thanks,
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I read it at a reading tonight. The most common response was, “You seem to know the same people we do!” Ha..Everyone recognized this lady.
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Ha. This is great. 🙂
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Thanks, Iris. I love to please!!
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This makes me smile 😀
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Like all the above I love the rhythm of this…were I on the receiving end of such unsolicited advice my response would not be printable. Were I to offer such advice to any of my female friends I would no longer be able to type. Wear what you want I say 😉
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Loved this poem. Even had a “jiggling” cadence that added its own whimsy.
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You have no idea how many times I’ve wanted to say something like this to someone, but just couldn’t do it. You say it so very well 🙂 I might suggest not ONLY a larger size, but an entirely different style.
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Wittily done.
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“Oh no she di’nt!
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