The Grump: A Pessimist’s Last Request


The Grump: A Pessimist’s Last Request

I don’t pander to the drug merchants. My pleasures are not herbal.
I don’t believe in drinking and I don’t get off on verbal.
Gossip is innocuous and I have no affection
for reading mystery novels. I am bored by their detection.
I do not seek adventure in movies or in travel.
I don’t see what folks see in Judge Judy’s pounding gavel. 
I don’t have any hobbies, for I find all pastimes boring.
I got rid of my wife for I can’t abide her snoring.
I don’t see what folks see in life so when time comes to end it,
please do not resuscitate. I don’t wish to extend it!

 

A disclaimer: this poem is preceded by a favorite photo I once took but in no way illustrates the person depicted. He’s a good sport and has let me use this photo three different times to illustrate humorous poems. 

Prompt words are adventure, innocuous, herbal, pander and affection.  And. . .this poem is purely fiction. Go ahead and resuscitate me!!!! 

6 thoughts on “The Grump: A Pessimist’s Last Request

  1. Marion Couvillion

    How strange~! I posted a poem of bad manners and when it was posted yours popped up. But I did use a photo of a person unknown to make my point – Ha~!

    On Wed, Jul 28, 2021 at 9:42 AM lifelessons – a blog by Judy Dykstra-Brown wrote:

    > lifelessons posted: ” The Grump: A Pessimist’s Last Request I don’t pander > to the drug merchants. My pleasures are not herbal. I don’t believe in > drinking and I don’t get off on verbal. Gossip is innocuous and I have no > affection for reading mystery novels. I am bore” >

    Like

    Reply
    1. lifelessons Post author

      When I post it usually attaches two earlier poems that have similar themes, plus below them two posts by other people on the same theme. Is that what happened to you?

      Like

      Reply

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