Bedbound

13 Replies

Bedbound

I have pain in my back and water on my knee
and not one single friend has expressed sympathy!
I’ve called every doctor in town to explain
my aches and my ills, but it’s all been in vain.

Not one can discover what it is that ails me.
Each remedy that I’ve sought out simply fails me.
The sun hurts my eyes and the rain brings depression.
It hurts when I walk but bed rest brings compression

that freezes my spine so I’m forced to just lie here,
seeking assistance from all who walk by here.
And although I’ve no appetite, still I must eat,
so there’s one request that I have to repeat.

If you’re going to town, could you help me out, please,
and bring me a pizza? Sausage. Extra cheese.
Because I’m so thin, the doctor prescribes beer.
and since there’s a Quik Stop that’s really quite near,

could you pick up a six-pack, some ice cream and chips?
For I simply must add some flesh to my hips.
My bones are protruding so far that they hurt
from the weight of the sheets and the thinnest night shirt.

I’m under the weather, headachy and  thin.
I cannot convey the bad shape that I’m in.
My offspring don’t care and my spouse says I’m making it
hard to stay with me because I’m just faking it.

I have to complain because I must confess it
is impossible when one is ill to repress it.
Although all my friends say I’ve bats in my attic,
these ills you can’t see are not psychosomatic!

Prompts today are under the weather, offspring, flush, repress and stay.

13 thoughts on “Bedbound”

  2. SAM VOELKER

    ADVICE FROM ANOTHER NAUGHTY OLD FART

    From the symptoms you gave, now let me see
    It sounds like a bad case of hypochondria to me
    as for the water on the knee back pain in the kidney
    a diuretic will put that water where it’s supposed to be.

    As for the sun in your eyes it happens to the masses
    so most of the younger folks simply wear sun glasses.
    Friends not paying enough attention to your depression
    just do not have enough time to listen to sad confessions.

    So you can’t walk or sit, can’t stand or even lye.
    Well you must at least do one of these by and by,
    there is nothing more you can do, surely you will die
    leaving the only thing left for you is to cry or try to fly.

    Didn’t your mother warn you, as a kid, long ago
    what happens to the ladies, every girl should know
    when those hot spells, & cold spells will come and go
    that age of depression, suspicion, and indigestion though .

    Your mate misunderstanding why you are so hyper
    is turning you from that sweet little thing into a sniper.
    who craves ice cream pickles beer even being a griper.
    Being smart, he will keep quiet or he must pay the piper~!

    This my dear is my opinion I fear, the best I can do
    and I hope my help will develop a better life for you
    look around, talk to friends then find that they hurt too
    so sit and talk or take a walk hypochondriacs are so blue~!.
    SAM

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