No News is Bad News

As I eat my morning toast,
I like to read the Morning Post.
But often, once my toast is browned,
The Morning Post’s not to be found.
I brew the coffee and have a cup,
willing the newsboy to show up.

As I eat my morning eggs,
my husband sputters, nags and begs
until I fantasize a muzzle.
He wants his morning crossword puzzle!
Yet that newsboy still delays
as breakfast passes without a phrase.

We leave for work sad and bereft,
looking to the right and left.
My husband prods and pokes and pushes
in case the news lies in the bushes,
but only finds an errant bee
and a missing front door key.

All day that sense of loss still lingers
as I crave newsprint on my fingers.
Somehow the day just isn’t nice
when it passes without advice.
No comics page? No horoscope?
All day I sit alone and mope.

Others ‘round me may be seen
watching news upon a screen.
But it isn’t quite the same,
so please excuse me while I blame
my bad mood once more on the kid
who brings the news––but never did!

By evening when I arrive home,
that rolled up, backless, coverless tome
has finally shown up by our door;
but day-old news is just a bore,
and comics read to a setting sun
somehow do not seem so fun.

As our puppy greets me, paws and muzzle,
I extract the crossword puzzle,
then smooth the rest and scoop it up
to place it under our wiggly pup
who lifts his leg and pees upon it.
News is not made to sup on it!

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Connect the Dots.” ––Scour the news for an entirely uninteresting story. Consider how it connects to your life. Write about that.

11 thoughts on “No News is Bad News”

    1. lifelessons's avatarlifelessons Post author

      ha. I don’t even know what is in the comics anymore. I’ve been without for 14 years and it is true. Can’t stand reading the news on the computer, so I read the blogs and listen in on other people’s conversations in restaurants. All my news is second hand unless it is going on in my house, and even then, sometimes. . . .

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    1. lifelessons's avatarlifelessons Post author

      Because you don’t want to be the last to know. I’ve changed though–mainly because I’m in Mexico, I guess. None of those papers four inches thick with funnies, crosswords, advice column, arts section, features. So I blog instead!!!

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    1. lifelessons's avatarlifelessons Post author

      Well, I guess we aren’t in the most modern poetry faction, but I do, too. Mostly, though, I have fun writing them. I know it is hard to take such a poem seriously, but I guess this is the age when I get to do what I want!!! Thanks for cheering me on, Maddy. (That is the internet name for one of my best friends.)

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  5. Leland Olson Hoel's avatarlghoelson

    Thanks for the poem
    it describes many a home.

    After forty three years, I’m thinking of canceling the subscription to our daily paper. I mainly read the obits, see which ones of my friends made the news. When I make the news it won’t make a whole lot of difference to me.The paper was great for the fish cleaning mess, don’t fish anymore. If I cancel the subscription we will just have to use the cooling racks when we make cookies. That might be a good thing. The new printer’s ink might make cookies toxic anyhow, peanut butter or not. No news, bad news, good news, we all get it all!

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