Category Archives: Humor

Visiting Mom in Jail

 

(Click on photos to enlarge.)

Coco has a new bad habit of reclining on the terrace table. As I was getting ready to do this prompt, I decided to try to incorporate her into the poem, using these photos as a further prompt.

Visiting Mom in Jail

If it were up to me, we’d both be off and hiking,
but as you can see, this is not to her liking.
You are all instrumental for the reason she is balking,
for Instead of hiking, she just lets her fingers do the walking.

Clearly, I don’t fancy this. I see no plusses to it.
I denounce this action and I’ll tell you why I rue it.
My phrases you’ll find piquant . They’ll clearly break your heart.
But when they come to moving her, they will not make a start.

As you can see from shots above, they keep Mom behind bars
and only let her out at night to swim beneath the stars.
We feel so sorry for her that when she goes in to bed,
we all stream in behind her and cluster ’round her head.

We’re sure she craves as company the doggies she adores,
though she complains that Zoe farts and brother Morrie snores.
As for me, I lick her face and hands and arms and neck.
She says she does not like it, but I just think, “What the heck?”

As long as we are all on the same side of the bars,
we need to reassure her we consider her as ours.
Meanwhile, in the daytime when we clearly are not able,
I’ll stay as close as I can be by lying on the table!!!

Prompts today are denounce, fancy, plus, piquant, hike and instrumental.

Nomenclaturation

(Dreaming up Words)

Nomenclaturation

The wind like floss, the air like silk,
saxophone music flows like milk.
Hecklers may insult my words,
saying that they are absurd,
and as my life draws near its gloaming,
I admit, attention’s roaming.
Yet I stand by the discrimination
of my nomenclaturation.


I sit in my chair and dream
as words flow by me in a dream.
I reach out for word after word,
selecting some that are absurd,
and when I find they do not rhyme,
I make up words time after time.
The practice didn’t start with me.
How do you think words came to be????

Prompts today are saxophone, heckler, discrimination, gloam, chair and silk.

Murphy’s Law

Murphy’s Law

An ambivalent lawyer cares hardly a jot
about whether he wins your law case or not.
An optimist one day, pessimistic the next,
if he’s your advisor, I fear you are hexed.

In the legal arena he just mills around.
His decisions are iffy, his judgement unsound.
An unusual confidant, when in a bind,
he’ll find it convenient to just change his mind.

So taking all factors into account,
as the trial goes on and the legal bills mount,
wrap up the case and accept your defeat

as a legal disaster you’ll never repeat!!

Prompt words today are optimist, arena, unusually, ambivalent, lawyyer andjot. Image by Ruthson Zimmerman on Unsplash.

Morning Menu

Morning Menu

If you desire a breakfast that’s full of health and crunch,
that will cast away your hunger from awakening to lunch,
lay a corn ear perpendicular and mash it all to bits,
relinquishing it’s former shape to turn it into grits.
No one will guess its origin. They will not have a hunch,
but it will solve their appetite if they eat a bunch.

 

Prompts today are crunch, origin, castaway, perpendicular, breakfast and relinquish.

New Year Resolutions

Here is a short reflection on New Year Resolutions:

New Year Resolutions

When the new year zaps us with our last year’s reflection,
it brings up all our defects and flaws for our detection.
It goads us to be better and to bend our crooked way
to plot a straighter game in life than we’ve been prone to play.
It’s January 1st that prods our consciences to make them,
giving us a whole long year in which to go and break them.

And here is a longer one: https://judydykstrabrown.com/2014/12/22/resolution/

 

For dVerse Poets: Resolutions
and if you want to read more poems on the subject, go HERE.

Poetic License

Poetic License

Pejorative words will not be allowed,
for poetry folk don’t assent to be cowed.
They want to feel wistful and somewhat romantic,
so they won’t put up with language pedantic.

Demur is acceptable. Artsy is cherished,
but flowery’s been banished and stilted has perished.
Inscrutable language is also passé
as is predictable. So déclassé!!!!

Step carefully, then, through the poetic world.
Take care before your words are unfurled.
For poetic license does not give permission
for outright acts of verbal sedition!!!

Prompt words are demur, pejorative, inscrutable, cherished, and wistful. Image by David Beale on Unsplash

 

Book Worm


Book Worm

My friend is loose but I’m demur.
She has more fun, you can be sure.
Her blinding smile can motivate
a guy to ask her for a date.

She’s best when she is center stage,
but I prefer the written page—
a square hole with a rounded peg
when I am asked to shake a leg,

I got the brains, she got the looks.
She parties on. I hit the books.
One of us was born to party,
but I’m the one who is the smarty.

Prompt words today are demur, loose, blinding, motivate, shake and stage. Image by Prasanna Kumar on Unsplaxh.

A Marital Discourse on The Subject of Light Exercise


A Marital Discourse on The Subject of Light Exercise

You breakfast, lunch and tea and sup,
hardly ever getting up.
I say that we should take a ride
just to get us both outside,

and thus do I precipitate
a lively marital debate—
you flummoxed by my rude suggestion
that interferes with your digestion.

So I employ another means
to distract you from your franks and beans.
Feeling youthful and impulsive,
I chance your finding it repulsive

and suggest that we go dancing
and perhaps do some romancing,
whereupon you rise and shriek
that your demise I surely seek.

Dancing at our advanced age?
You spit and sputter, in a rage,
and since for minutes you don’t pause,
at least you exercise your jaws.

Prompt words today are precipitate, flummoxed, shriek, impulsive, employ and ride.

Finicky Lovers

Finicky Lovers

Finicky lovers inspect water glasses,
ask if you’re vaxed before they make passes.
Chuckle at jokes, but only the funny ones,
eat hard-boiled eggs, but balk at the runny ones.

They run the gamut of each picky habit.
See every spot and are certain to dab it.
Do not buy on clearance, for things are picked over.
Will lie in the grass, but only in clover.

They sweep off your driveway before they can park,
but first cover their tires so they’ll leave no mark.
If you think this is odd, when they remove their pants,
they must make a crisp fold before they advance!

Prompt words today are chuckle, sweep, finicky, gamut, clearance and advance. Image by  Jonathan Cosens on Unsplash.

“Sin”chronicity

“Sin”chronicity

I’m circumspect about temptation,
for though it may cause elation,
due to its duplicity,
it may lead to toxicity.

I believe the oft-heard rumor
that fate has a sense of humor.
Example: you are running late
and seek the airport taxi gate.

When you arrive and reconnoiter
you say you have no time to loiter,
so they let you jump the queue,
but then the taxi runs over you.

Perhaps that only goes to show
there’s some advantage to going slow,
but I believe man’s jubilation
comes from avoiding temptation!

Today’s prompts are temptation, circumspect, toxicity, loiter,
and taxi. Image by Jordan Andrews on Unsplash.