Category Archives: humorous poem

Welcome

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IMG_0537

Welcome

My instinct is toward empathy, but I must admit
it’s harder to have empathy for someone who’s a twit.
And though lack of hospitality is something of a sin,
some guests are more welcome going out than coming in!!!

 

RDP didn’t post a prompt today, so we’re limited to three. They are instinct, empathy and hospitality. Here are the links:
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/21/fowc-with-fandango-instinct/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/21/your-daily-word-prompt-empathy-may-21-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/21/hospitality/

Drama Queen

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Photo by Matthew T. Rader on Unsplash

Drama Queen

Your disingenuous comments come off as less than real.
In fact, I can’t help thinking you display more than you feel.
You feign blustery emotions. You fuss and you emote,
and yet your words seem bigger than the feelings they denote.
Your dialogue is fervent. You shout and plead and bleat,
but I’m afraid your fiery comments seem to lack real heat.
Before further encounters and angst-filled future sessions,
may I make a suggestion? I’d suggest acting lessons.

https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/20/fowc-with-fandango-disingenuous/
https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/05/20/rdp-monday-blustery/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/20/your-daily-word-prompt-fervent-may-20-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/20/fog/

Travel Primer

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Travel Primer

We wander narrow alleyways in countries that are foreign—
negotiate their tunnels, like rabbits in a warren.
We do not pay attention as we ogle and we gawk
who may follow closely—who may observe and stalk.
We are naive travelers. We’re innocents abroad.
One listens to our narratives, then signals with a nod
just as we are reaching to try to reimburse,
for another watcher to swoop down on our purse.
Then they’re off down alleyways where we are loath to go
where they’ll have their own adventures—financed by our dough.

 

 

Today’s prompts were stalk, abroad, narrative and foreign. Links are here:
https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/05/19/rdp-sunday-stalk/
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/19/fowc-with-fandango-abroad/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/19/your-daily-word-prompt-narrative-may-19-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/19/foreign/

Lucky: The Pleasures of Advancing Age

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(Click on photos to enlarge.)

Lucky
(The Pleasures of Advancing Age)

If I were a golfer, I fear there’d be no putting,
for my grass is lush and verdant— badly in need of  cutting.
Meanwhile, the bougainvillea has gotten out of hand.
It’s like a barbed wire jungle—every twisted strand.
If I were more rambunctious, I’d grab work gloves and scramble
to gas up the mower and to tackle every  bramble,
but those days of industrious gardening are far back in my past.
Those Olympian feats of plant and tend simply didn’t last.
Instead I lie here in my bed growing and trimming words.
Outside, through the curtains, I hear the wakening birds.
I hear the front gate opening, make out the squeak of wheels.
Is there a single reader who detects how good it feels
to just fluff up the pillows and type on throughout the dawn
as Pasiano trims the thorny vines and mows the blasted lawn?

Prompt words today are verdant, meanwhile, rambunctious and lucky. Here are links:
https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/05/13/rdp-monday-verdant/
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/13/fowc-with-fandango-meanwhile/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/13/your-daily-word-prompt-rambunctious-may-13-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/13/lucky/

Empty Stocking

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Empty Stocking

Early in September, below the slippery slide,
Ella McLauglin asked me if I would step aside
and let her have a turn at it before I took another,
and since I looked around and couldn’t see her older brother,
I said no girls could play on it. This slide was just for “men,”
then bounded up the ladder and slid on down again.

Later, In October,  I thought it would be fun
to raid our neighbor’s pumpkin patch, to smash them and then run.
Some friends wanted to help me, but I wielded the bat.
Those pumpkins all exploded with such a lovely “splat!”
Mr. Cramer chased us, but he fell and hit his head,
and by the time he reached our house, I was snug in bed!

At the beginning of November, right after Halloween,
I opened sister’s window and removed the screen.
I found her bag of candy, making off with all the best,
leaving her with licorice and apples and the rest
left over after I had taken chocolates and  toffee.
What I left? The gross flavors like cinnamon and coffee!

But for all of December, I remembered to be good.
Mom had said that Santa kept accounts and that he would 
know if I was naughty, so I knew this was the time
when I needed to be perfect—the very paradigm
of virtue, yet in spite of this, I must sadly relate
that all my efforts to reform simply came  too late.

It seems that I just waited too long in turning face.
You can’t just come in sliding tardily into base
when it comes to changing “naughty” check marks into “nice,”
for Santa checks his naughty list more than once or twice.
Next Christmas I am going to be sure that I remember,
that Santa also checks the months that lead up to December!

 

 

Only two prompts  had been posted by 4 a.m. this morning when I was ready for a rhyming.  Those prompt words were slide and paradigm. Here are their links:
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/12/fowc-with-fandango-slide/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/12/your-daily-word-prompt-paradigm-may-12-2019/

Premeditated

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Premeditated

I’ve got you in my crosshairs, you can’t escape my aim.
In fact it’s very obvious I’ll wound or kill or maim.
Do you see my lifted eyebrow? Is my message coming through?
It should not be ambiguous what’s happening to you.
I really have it in for you. It’s true I mean to bite you.
You’re fully in my power, so there’ll be no need to fight you.
There’s no other fate in store for you. No other choice to make.
After twenty-one days of dieting, I’m having me some cake!!!!

 

 

The prompt words are crosshairs, ambiguous, obvious and eyebrow:
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/10/fowc-with-fandango-crosshairs/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/10/your-daily-word-prompt-ambiguous-may-10-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/10/obvious/
https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/05/10/rdp-friday-eyebrow/

 

Escape?

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photo with permission by Adam Stefanca

Escape?

Tourists of every size and shape
visit the zoo to stand and gape
at lion, leopard, tiger, ape.
They eye its thickness as they gape
at chainlink, conjure up the scrape
of claws on metal, then on nape.
What is their likelihood of escape?

 

 

Today’s prompt word is escape.
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/09/escape/