A Remote Possibility
I spent all day in town today for business and for pleasure,
so by the time I got back home, I felt I’d had full measure
of driving-selling-trying on, shopping-eating-walking;
so I just thought I’d have some time that didn’t include talking.
I put my suit on thinking I would jump right in the pool,
but then the cat began to whine, the dogs commenced to drool—
sure signals it was feeding time—in this they were united.
They’ve learned their human serves their supper faster when invited.
The problem was, the dog food was still up in the car,
so I ran out to get it. (It wasn’t very far.)
I fed the dogs and cat, then found new flea collars I’d bought,
and so, of course, I had to put new collars on the lot.
Then, finally, the pool was mine—aerobic exercise
kept my body busy while a movie wooed my eyes
to disregard the time that passed while bending, kicking, flopping,
for when I am distracted, I am less intent on stopping.
With no prompt to finish early, I just went on and on.
Two hours passed so quickly that the setting of the sun
(and the ending of the movie—I guess I must admit)
finally gave the signal that it was time to quit.
But as I climbed the ladder, something poked my breast—
something sharp and lumpy that had made a little nest
there between my cleavage all my hours in the pool;
and when I drew it out you can’t image what a fool
I felt like, for this faux pas cannot help but win the prize
of all the times that I’ve done stupid things in any guise.
As teacher, daughter, writer, artist, sister, lover, friend,
I’ve committed stupid acts impossible to mend.
But this one takes the cake, I’m sure, as stupidest by far.
I’ve told you how I went to get the pet food from the car,
then fed and put flea collars on protesting dogs and cat.
(I doubt you’d do much better when dealing with all that!)
When I went out to do all this, I didn’t want to lose ‘em.
That’s why my car keys (with remote) wound up within my bosom!
Try as we may, those little indicators of age will sneak up on us. There is no plastic surgery for a sagging memory!!! But, wonder of wonders, when I put the key in the ignition the next morning, it worked!!! Saved on this one.
https://dailyaddictions542855004.wordpress.com/2018/07/18/remote-july-18-2018/

🙂
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Just curious: does the remote still work? When my husband dunked my blutooth in my Cuba Libre, the gadget apparently didn’t like the flavor. It sneezed and concked out. Did your car remote enjoy the swim?
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I dried it out well without opening it and by the next morning it worked. Then my car got run head first into a brick wall and the car no longer worked and had to be junked. Alas.
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I am sure the car didn’t do it on its own – are you ok, Judy?
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This happened over a year ago. I have a different car now.
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That’s why you can joke about it – I see.
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Being dunked in a Cuba Libre isn’t the worst way to die, though.
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True, but the dearly departed gadget is sorely missed! They don’t make this model anymore.
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Sorry..I had already lost my other one so good thing the dunked one still worked after two hours in the water.
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Ha ha ha…and I was so impressed how all together you were.
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Glad the remote still works. That’s a nest I’d never used!
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Wonderful and funny.
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This was a fun read. Isn’t it astonishing how much we do and still try to squeeze in a little me time. Love your sentiment on surgery for sagging memory.
Somehow, we do manage.
Isadora 😎
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😀 a got a pair of girls you’d have to pry stuff out of!!! LOL
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Ha.. I saw your comment in notifications and was trying to figure out what you might be alluding to. Then I clicked on your comment to see what it was in regard to and it all made sense! Sounds like good security. oxox
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