Too Many Cooks
(The Food Critic Invades the Kitchen)
In the guise of gourmand, I fear that you laid waste
to my soup’s exquisite balance after one swift reckless taste.
You lifted up the salt shaker and ruined my day’s work
by heavily over-salting my consommé, you jerk!
Then you made it cloudy by adding a fair dollop
of sour cream that sat there like a tumor or a polyp.
The soup base that I’d toiled over for many an hour,
you squeezed a bit of lime into, transforming sweet to sour.
So in the end when you pronounced the verdict on my soup,
rating it as less than gourmet food and more like goop,
you neglected to take credit for your efforts at its ruin.
Now I rue the day my lovely soup chanced to meet your spoon!!
Prompt words today are gourmand, base, guise and cloudy. Links are below:
https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/05/11/rdp-saturday-gourmand/
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/05/11/fowc-with-fandango-base/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/05/11/your-daily-word-prompt-guise-may-11-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/05/11/cloudy/
That was quite an invasion of your kitchen!!!
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Fiction, Janet. I don’t let anyone near my soup until it is served!!!
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I just love what you do with multiple prompts.
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Thanks, Andrea. I love love the challenge. Better than crossword puzzles and jigsaw puzzles combines.
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A tasteless gourmand indeed!
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How are you doing with your cooking, Leland?
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I call it a kitchen tragedy, but I know it’s only your fantasy, Judy. My, but you do have some dark fantasies!
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Ha.. That was supposed to be humor, Dolly. Only a horror story to a serious chef like you!!
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Definitely a horror story, but I have a good old heavy cast iron frying pan ready to discourage invaders!
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I went to buy an orange juice squeezer (for a friend) at a moving sale down the block and found a HUGE stew pot–maybe 14 inches high and 14 inches across.. with lid–bigger than I’d ever need, but I had a sudden flash that Yolanda might like it. I left it in the backseat of the car and when I gave her a ride home Friday, my eyes lit on it and I asked her if she needed one. Her eyes lit up like I’d offered her diamonds. She was thrilled. I mean, this pot is huge…big enough to cook tamales in. She said her daughter had used her only other big saucepan as a drum and had ruined it.. Ha.
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To my shame, I’ve lived in this country for 40 years and never learned non-metric measures. I had to think hard about those inches, but that’s about 35 by 35 cm, and I have a “kazan” this size and a fish pot three times as big. Aren’t you glad you made Yolanda happy!
P.S. My brother once took down a window drape and cut it into shreds to resemble a cape worn by a Russian revolutionary general he had seen in a movie. But the general also had a huge mustache, so my brother denuded our mother’s fluffy hat and attached it to his face by shoe wax, dyeing it black in the process. Needless to say, it took our grandmother to prevent his backside from turning red…
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Your brother was just recycling!
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Repurposing, rather…
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