An arresting behavior and aquiline nose
insure female attention wherever he goes,
and yet since he walks at a most rapid pace
and there’s always a new book in front of his face,
one must consider, just what are the chances
that he would see even one lady’s advances?
The literature that he daily reads
satisfies all his vicarious needs.
So though he must know what it is that he’s missing—
the adventure and romance and hugging and kissing—
and though more than one gal has chosen to tout it,
I fear he’s unlikely to do much about it.
They flutter their lashes and pooch out their lips,
flex their lithe bodies and rotate their hips,
but nary a glance does our scholar cast on them.
None of his attention is wasted upon them.
For though he is definitely romance-prone,
it seems he prefers to enjoy it alone.