Rice-Burns

Rice-Burns

After the engagement and the wedding bash,
after opening the presents and putting out the trash,
the groom fell into reverie, staring at the dark
waiting for revelation to ignite a spark.
All his cache of memories no longer served their function.
He longed to hear his bride murmuring words of tender unction.
But she retired early, exhausted from the stress
of all the machinations since she had answered “Yes!”
Thus did another wedding night turn out to be a dud
as wedding over-planning nipped romance in the bud.

 

Prompt words for today are spark, reverie, groom and cache.

10 thoughts on “Rice-Burns

  1. SAM VOELKER

    They ain’t seen nothing yet, wait until the bills start coming in~! The beauty of the area where my place is, called the “Texas Hill Country,”, complete with rolling hills, flowing creeks etc has become “the place” to construct wedding venues… and wine “sippey Lou” tasting places, They cut down most of the trees to make room for obnoxious tabernacles and one room shotgun sleeping quarters, then start busing them into our solitude each weekend. Too much money, with about $12,000, plus for a cheap wedding. So no wonder only about 50 percent last~! One of them down the road from me looks more like a house of prostitution than a place to hitch up to the one you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with~!

    When Shirley and I go married in Dallas, it was $3.00 for the license and twenty dollars”tip” for the Unitarian minister (who I knew), with only his secretary as a witness. But then afterwards we went to a little tea room for tea and crumpets as our wedding “feast” and spent most of the night heading toward Houston in my little ’59 Corvair~!. It lasted 50 years, all it really needed was LOVE and we had plenty of that~! ($20 was a lot of money back then~!) Oh I feel a post coming on~!!

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    1. lifelessons Post author

      I think my wedding cost $1,000 for venue, flowers, cake, wine and meal. Probably about 60 guests. And this was in California! And I had a corsage made for every female attendee. One of the photos above is of our wedding cake and the wine toast was Bob and me. Didn’t want to show faces as the poem is not about anyone I know..although I think the ending might seem familiar to a few.

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      1. SAM VOELKER

        It seems that the “mind thought” today is: “the more you spend, the better the marriage is going to be”, which I was trying to point out. A young couple just starting out in married life, do so with that terrible debt hanging over them, I doubt that very many (fathers of the bride) help anymore, as they are often coming from a broken family in the first place. Sorry to be pessimistic, but I have seen so much of this among friends. We had a beautiful marriage, exactly what we both wanted, for reasons beyond what I said. I will try to post that in the next day or two. A different time a different way and a different couple from the normal. (except for that old “ex ladies man of the world” involved) But she quickly fixed that with her love, never anger, and yes before I met her, I knew when pay day was near when I started having sandwiches, due to running out of money, Typical bachelor of the day. That first month she put me on a budget and I never realized that you could go past payday and still have money in the bank or even in your pocket~!

        Now that I have been so negative, a positive report on something that has been bothering me a lot~! I am scheduled to get my Covid shot on Wednesday, but must drive all the way to Houston to get it. Politics keeps Austin in a state of not even enough vaccine to take care of the health care workers.

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  2. slmret

    My nephew’s wife was a wedding planner until recently — I was amazed at the amounts of money people paid for their weddings, and the amount of planning that went into the day. Yes, the perfect day does take some planning, but there are limits to the time, money, and energy that need to go into that planning!

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  3. Christine Goodnough

    They both have my sympathy. Weddings can be exhausting when you have to get every detail so perfect and spend hours on your feet.
    re: costs: When we were living in Montreal we heard about the high cost of wedding meals there (25 years back) with dinners at $12 a plate, hall rental $5k not to mention gowns, photos, etc. Some families rented limos.
    The rule of thumb for guests, we were told, was that you should bring a gift equal to what the family is spending to host & feed you. If a family of four were invited to a wedding they were to bring a gift equal to that X4. Getting invited to a wedding was a jolt to the budget!
    In our church circles we don’t do the white dresses fancy cakes photos dance thing. The bride (or someone skilled in her family) sews a good Sunday dress she can wear later to other functions — like other weddings. 🙂 Parents provide the bulk of the meal, but congregations help with the food and housing visitors. No church hall rental charged.

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  4. SAM VOELKER

    I like your post Christine, and my story is yet to be told, but it follows a lot of your church practices. We may be proud, and that is OK, within reason, that we have “come a long way”, but what we think that we have, we may actually have lost along the way, and this is sad. This starting of a life with a very high cost is very simply one upmanship ~ ad infinitum~! Coupled with a big business which will push the uninformed into an unreasonable direction. That same couple may, before they can afford it, then buy a big “Mac Mansion” with three bedrooms and four baths, a double door entry way, which is two stories high, a double car garage which they tool their big car into at night, never using that entry and hire some other person to cut that “lawn” that they rarely even see because their next episode of “As The World Turns” is coming on TV in the next few minutes and it tells a lot about what life should be like: or they must get to the gym for their exercise….This is a story all too often told and when the money gets tight, the arguments start, and it is the beginning of the end~!

    However that girl who sows her own wedding dress, helps fix the wedding dinner, designs, writes and publishes the wedding invitation, and the husband who helps out with these and budgets the arrangements of the wedding at the church or even in the park, so many beautiful less expensive places for location etc. This is showing that they are more careful with life in general, and memories will be more pleasant unique and bright in the long run so they will be more happily married due to doing it their selves with love instead of money (which they usually do not yet have anyway). Rather than those who are trying to out do their friends and then fight over the budget because they started off in a negative.

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    1. Christine Goodnough

      Thanks for your reply to my Comment. While we were in MTL one young woman told me her parents had offered her $50,000 if she and her fiance would elope, but she said, “NO way. We want the whole wedding deal.” I’ve heard of parents taking out loans or mortgages to pay for a wedding!
      Yes, definitely keeping up with the Joneses. A lot is done for show, but by the time “everyone’s doing it” nobody remembers or knows anything different.

      And, as you say, t guarantees nothing. When my sister, who had no use for churches, married a fellow who was a church-goer, she wanted the whole nine yards. Gown, meal, dance, band. His more conservative church wouldn’t put on that kind of splash so they picked a very “open-minded” church in town. She was 40ish, he was 60-some and divorced — old enough to know what they were about.
      For all that, the marriage lasted nine months. She said later, “It was the biggest mistake in my life.” Though I’ve never met him, I imagine he has similar sentiments.

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