Tag Archives: Costco

Costco Owes Me Thirty Minutes!!!

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Yes, it’s true. Costco owes me thirty minutes, which is how long it took
me to get this blasted can of Kirkland Tomato Paste Open!!!!
How is that possible and why was it Costco’s fault? Let me tell you. The story begins when my neighbors Sergio and David asked if I needed anything at Costco. I asked them to get me hamburger and they returned with a package the size of a large newborn baby..7 1/2 lbs! So, I divided it into 7 one pound packages and one 1/2  pound one. Click on pictures to enlarge and hear the rest of the tale.

 

made a meatloaf out of 1 1/2 pounds of the remains, and meatballs out of the rest.
Of course, meatballs screamed out for a sauce, so I tried to open this tomato paste,
but my can opener wouldn’t work,
and when I tried using my punch opener, the paste came oozing up but was too thick to pour out.
When I went to borrow my neighbor’s can opener, his wouldn’t work either, so he gouged it open, but it was impossible to get all the paste out.
Then he had a brilliant thought. Perhaps they had put the label on upside down and you had to open it from the bottom!
And he was right. The fault was not in my can opener, but in the factory. Turned over, the can opened like a charm.
And when the tomato paste was removed (careful, sharp edges) this bit of artistry was revealed.
And although it took me as long to get the can open as to prepare the rest of the sauce, After the sauce had simmered on the stovetop, I added the meatballs I’d made earlier
and popped them in the oven at a low heat.
An hour later.. voila!

 

Change of Plans

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img_4755-1                                                          jdbphoto

Change of Plans

On the day you finally realize
that you have gone up a size,
you vow that this time when you try it,
you’re going to stay upon your diet.

The problem is your kitchen’s fraught
with all the food that you just bought.
A trip to Costco sealed your doom,
for though you went to buy a broom

and paper towels and toilet paper,
once you began your shopping caper,
you had no choice except to go
past the chips and candy row.

And then the bakery, with those pies
and cakes right there before your eyes!
So now it seems you must defray
your diet for another day.

There is some force inside that store
so even purists shop for more.
One goes in steadfast, stoic, haughty,
and comes out gluttonous and naughty.

Forgive yourself. No mortal can go
into that store and simply stow
one item in their cart or two.
(Or even wind up with a few.)

The problem is the route you took
and the fact you chose to look.
You should have bought, it is the truth,
more lettuce and less Baby Ruth.

The prompt today was “Realize.”