Unsolicited Advice

Unsolicited Advice

I don’t like to criticize,
but, darling, do you think it wise
to wear those pants that emphasize
your long life of no exercise
and those big Macs with extra fries?

It is a choice I don’t advise,
for though you have such pretty eyes,
and face like poets eulogise,
your tucked-in blouse does not disguise
a figure Rubenesque in size.

It’s true Kim K. was aggrandised
by buttocks that were super-sized,
augmented and eroticized,
without a doubt romanticized
and surely over-publicized.

But still, dear, must you advertise
that derriere to all the guys?
Unless you’re set to capitalize
on spreading butt and super-thighs,
might I suggest a larger size?

The prompt today was criticize.

This entry was posted in Poems and tagged , , , on by .

About lifelessons

My blog, which started out to be about overcoming grief, quickly grew into a blog about celebrating life. I post daily: poems, photographs, essays or stories. I've lived in countries all around the globe but have finally come to rest in Mexico, where I've lived since 2001. My books may be found on Amazon in Kindle and print format, my art in local Ajijic galleries. Hope to see you at my blog.

42 thoughts on “Unsolicited Advice

  1. sanjuan831

    Unfortunately this can be so true and we see gals out in exercise or yoga pants all the time….wait…uh, I am one of those gals. Dang.


    1. lifelessons Post author

      Noticed a repeat rhyme in the last stanza, so made a slight change. There is still one repeat, but in stanzas so far away from each other that I’m letting it slide for now as I have a reading in a half hour. That’s cutting it close, no?


    1. lifelessons Post author

      I love the challenge of just using one rhyme in a poem. In this one I noticed I used two of the same words twice. Corrected one in an edit but left the other as the repetition was in stanzas far apart. I may eventually think of a way to remove the other repetition. It is fun. Like a puzzle.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. paul scribbles

    Like all the above I love the rhythm of this…were I on the receiving end of such unsolicited advice my response would not be printable. Were I to offer such advice to any of my female friends I would no longer be able to type. Wear what you want I say 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Marilyn Armstrong

    You have no idea how many times I’ve wanted to say something like this to someone, but just couldn’t do it. You say it so very well 🙂 I might suggest not ONLY a larger size, but an entirely different style.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.