The housesitter I met was really a dear
but the friend she invited was not, so I hear
from the neighbors awakened by shouting at three
who related the details later to me.
The spare dog left over when they departed
was sweet but destructive. He barked and he farted.
He fell off my roof and he swims in my pool,
so I gated the roof for I am no one’s fool.
Built pool steps so he could exit with ease,
but I’m also allergic so I cough and I sneeze.
Three dogs were too much so I built them a room,
replaced all the chewed up books, beds and broom.
She broke my best dish and her guy was a louse,
so though dogs are welcome here in my house,
humans are on trial. If their actions are needless,
no more invitations go out to the heedless!
To be fair, this poem is an amalgam of several different housesitters, and I’ve had some good ones as well, so don’t be insulted if you were one of the good’uns!!!
The prompt was “hospitality.”