This movie’s so sad it should come with a tissue
and a spare one as well with the first one they issue.
I blush to admit how my tears are just gushing.
I’m surrounded by neighbors complaining and shushing.
It’s uncanny that I’d pay good money for this.
Nine dollars for me and nine dollars for sis.
I don’t need the mood swing. I don’t need this sadness—
exchanging for tears my earlier gladness.
If they’re going to produce such sad entertainment,
a least they could provide adequate containment
for all of the tears and the blowing of noses.
Entertainment this year was no bed of roses!