Things My Mother Taught Me
I’ve used you as a paradigm of what I want to be,
and for those years I had a child, raised her as you raised me.
Used your fine discernment in establishing the rules.
Taught her to respect herself and not to suffer fools.
Issued all the necessary caveats and warnings,
tucked her into bed at night and rousted her most mornings.
Help her when she needed it and then I let her be,
for the truest gift you give a child is when you set her free.
Prompt words are caveat, paradigm, necessity and discernment.
lifelessons - a blog by Judy Dykstra-Brown 
You are clever Judy.
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All due to my mother…
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Mine did pretty good, right up to that last line, but I am still not free of her. However from that too I learned in a negative way, and gave my boys the freedom to think for their selves, as I never had, and I never will without guilt~!
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You are right… we learn by imitation and avoidance. My folks were very supportive but great at letting go..I will be eternally grateful.
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My problem, as you probably noticed, was the church. She was as loving as a person could possibly be, but she used the bible to guide her on how to raise and take care of a family, and even her husband took second place. That is really not a very good guide on how to raise growing children in modern times~! Twice on Sunday, and once at mid week, then a lot of our summer time with others pointing their fingers at us instead of a good hug and personal love.
But YES I had a great marriage and great kids, showing them that they all came first, even before God or others who professed Him~! Especially my sisters, had to dress like them, read the books they approved, and listen to the music they said we could.. Of course we sneak around (with the help of my dad) and even went to the movies and concerts, when she was not watching. SIN~!, SIN~! But I did turn out OK, because I saw how it should NOT be done~! I only hope that others learn the same way. Love can be badly misguided, while at the same time the perpetrator may be thinking they are doing the right thing~!
https://mcouvillion.wordpress.com/2022/11/20/what-is-true-love/
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I was just thinking today that I’m more afraid of the religious right than the cartels. They at least don’t try to determine personal issues for people. I know this is an extreme opinion but those who do vile actions and claim piety are the most frightening in their smugness and false piety. Consider the Spanish Inquisition..
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SO VERY TRUE JUDY, AND MY RESPONSE TO YOU IS SO IMPORTANT (TO ME) THAT I POSTED IT IN A BLOG HERE~!
https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/#inbox/FMfcgzGsmDmpLJRDshMKPJWmXzmdjxvc
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Beautiful Having a mom with the courage to set a kid free is a real blessing.
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So beautiful Judy.
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