Open Letter to the Airline Mucky-Mucks: (For dVerse Poets)

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Open Letter to the Airline Mucky-Mucks

To Whom It May Concern:

My carry-on’s too heavy to lift above my seat,
so I had to put it under, now there’s no room for my feet.
I request some water (though I’ve been twice rebuffed,)
to take an antihistamine, for my eyes are puffed
from the perfume of my seatmate, which also made me cough.
So I’m already hurting long before lift off.
I’ve squeeze marks from the narrow seats, I’m shivering from the draft,
and when this ride is over, I must board another craft!

Two hours later, two states up, I face another battle
trying to find a decent airport meal here in Seattle.
On my muffuletta sandwich (priced $15.93),
I look in vain for olives, which there don’t seem to be.
My Tim’s potato chips are stale, the sodas are all flat.
The Wifi that they advertise does not know where I’m at.
Air travel’s an adventure but not the one I sought.
I forget this lesson once again, refusing to be taught.

One hour left ‘til I lift off to wing my way on east,
I buy a drink and steel myself to board your winged beast.
I hope this time my seatmate fits in her own seat
so I don’t have to deal again with the impossible feat
of leaning out into the aisle, avoiding every ass
of passengers and stewards that brush me as they pass.
I bitch, I whine, I grouse, I cry, complain and moan and sigh.
‘Til by now I’m sure you wonder why I even fly.

I must admit I’ve asked myself the same as I’ve been talking.
The only reason I have found is that it sure beats walking.

 

For dVerse Poets prompt: Write a poem in the form of a letter.

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About lifelessons

My blog, which started out to be about overcoming grief, quickly grew into a blog about celebrating life. I post daily: poems, photographs, essays or stories. I've lived in countries all around the globe but have finally come to rest in Mexico, where I've lived since 2001. My books may be found on Amazon in Kindle and print format, my art in local Ajijic galleries. Hope to see you at my blog.

28 thoughts on “Open Letter to the Airline Mucky-Mucks: (For dVerse Poets)”

  2. slmret's avatarslmret

    This is in part the reason I’ve not taken numerous flights around the US over the last few years! A very funny poem, stating your case very well — perhaps it should go to the head of Delta, who seems to be listening to the public right now!

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  4. isaiah46ministries's avatarisaiah46ministries

    I am afraid of flying, but I want to see the world. It is a necessary discomfort. Lately, there is a problem on at least one leg, but when I arrive in another country and interact with people and see the sights, I am so happy. Ayes, the seats het narrower as I get wider, so here’s to th weary traveler, may we keep flying. Wonderful post. I plan to park here one day and read some prior posts.

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  11. hirundine608's avatarhirundine608

    This is all so true. Yet, we are treated as potential suspects. With body searches, baggage checks, etc. Yes, I remember turning up for a flight being accompanied to my departure gate by friends. If on a stop-over. One could walk out freely, returning for the next leg of journey. No hassle. We did not have to book in, three hours ahead. If you get a teenager in the seat next to you? They will spend the whole flight fussing with devices. I never enjoyed that type of travel, flying. Being an “economy” passenger. The flights are inevitably completely full, these days. Gone are the halcyon days of being able to have an empty seat or even a row, to stretch out on. I might mention the baggage woes but will not. Cheers Jamie

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