Screwing it Up
The superlative woman never winds up in the middle,
for in other people’s marriages she has no urge to fiddle.
Not one fraction of her being is cunning or deceptive.
She belittles no one but is always most receptive
to helping friends with problems, and she always finds an answer
in combatting any problem short of income tax or cancer.
Has she any weakness? I’ve found only one so far.
She is totally hopeless at opening a jar!
Though she tries unscrewing it using all her might,
somehow every lid she meets is just screwed on too tight,
and though she’s never screwed up in anything she did,
it avails her little when unscrewing a lid.
Prompt words for today are superlative, belittle, deceptive, fraction, middle, woman and irrational.
A wide rubber band along the edge of the lid does the trick for me!
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Well nobody is perfect, but she seems close enough. 😍
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the saavy woman learns to just take the thick, blunt end of a butter knife, tap it around the edge a bit – try again, hold under hot water, try again – and somehow? 9.999 times out of 10 one or the other or both – work – if not? she didn’t need that ‘thing’ anyways – easier than walking over to neighbor’s house with teen aged boy with big hands and bulging muscles saying, “could he please open this for me??” – – LOL
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Actually, hitting the side of the lid against the floor or cutting board usually works, as does using a dental dam, but those damn Tonic bottled defy both of those methods and require a set of pliers. Or a hefty waiter if not at home.
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😀 I hear ya! I have busted/spewed lids under carbonation pressure trying the ‘tap’ to open – but big jars? Not full of ‘oomph’ fizz? meh – i’ll risk it – – LOL
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