Tag Archives: silly answers

Fractured Song Titles, for Fibbing Friday, Oct 6, 2023

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Our topic to lie about this Friday is song titles, so here goes!

Here is the prompt: “This week I’ve chosen Song Titles, but rather than fib about who sung them, can you improvise on what they are about?”

1. Spirit in the Sky: Cocktail hour on the space shuttle.
2. MacArthur Park: What did the WW2 American Pacific commander do when he finally drove into Tokyo? (Actually, Forgottenman came up with this great answer after reading the lame one I had apologized for in an earlier version of this posting. He graciously gave me permission to claim it as my own which my conscience will not let me do!)
3. A Whiter Shade of Pale: Skin tone of Anglos after a long winter season.
4. Crocodile Rock; What we called it when we danced to  Billy Haley’s “See You Later, Alligator, After Awhile Crocodile” in the fifties.
5. Run: What we hope and pray Trump ultimately won’t be able to do again!!!
6. Don’t it make your brown eyes blue:  Contact lens ad.
7. Heaven can wait: Sign at the gate of Purgatory.
8. One night in Bangkok: Approximately 1/10th of the price of a stay at a Motel 6 in the U.S.
9. I know him so well: What Stormy Daniels  says she is “absolutely willing to testify to in court.”
10. Here comes the Sun: What Mom says to Dad every morning as she sees the paper boy pedal up on his bike.

For Pensitivity’s Fibbing Friday

The Lost Blogger Attempts Fibbing Friday, Sept. 15, 2023

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1. Have a break :  What one sumo wrestler said to another before jumping, full weight, on his leg.
2. You’re never alone with a strand : What the keeper said to the Hawaiian lady wearing a lei as he advised her to take it off before she entered the apiary.
3. Snap! Crackle! Pop! The answer the sumo wrestler’s body made to the statement of the sumo wrestler in line 1.
4. The Ultimate Driving Machine:  What other golfers call  Jack Nicklaus.
5. Don’t leave home without it:  The front door key.
6. Have it your way. The final retort of the loser in a marital disagreement
7. Good to the last drop:  Slogan inscribed on the side of a nuclear bomb.
8. Hello Moto: What the one-year-old birthday boy said as he opened his first Hot Wheel gift.
9. Taste the rainbow. What the rain says to the earth just as the sun comes out as it is departing.
10. Because you’re worth it. My reassurance uttered mentally to my conscience each time I buy a new piece of art knowing I have no place left to hang it!

 

For Fibbing Friday Sept. 15, 2023

Fibbin’ Friday, June 23, 2023

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The questions for this week are:

1. What is rubella?  It is what Bella’s husband learned to do too late in the game, after he’d already married her. 

2. What is Winter Fever more commonly known as?  Cold sweats.

3. What is Scrofula? ‘S Count Dracula’s pet Crow.

4. What is Grippe? The present tense of Groppe.

5. What is Quinsy? A state of whimsy brought on by the consumption of too much quince wine.

6. What is St Vitus Dance? It is what they renamed the road that ran along the edge of the San Andreas fault after the last big earthquake.

7. What is Dropsy? The eighth dwarf, seldom seen in public.

8. What is Croup? The inedible remnants of a bowl of soup consisting mainly of soggy  croutons.

9. What is Ague?  A gue is one-half of two gues.

10. What is Apoplexy?   Consternation  brought on by the constant updating and altering of computer applications. (Or, if you were from South Dakota, seizures brought on by an over-indulgence in Coca-Cola, but otherwise you might not understand this one.)

For Fibbing Friday, June 23, 2023

“Pants on Fire” For Fibbing Friday, June 16

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Here are this week’s questions:

What can you make with saw dust and snow?

Dusty the Snowman

2. What did the mole say to the wart?

Want to meet me at Wolemart?

3. Why is Atlantis lost?

GPS hadn’t been invented yet.

4. Why have Earthlings not returned to the moon?

No McDonalds

5. Why is the Earth round?

Because it’s not cool to be square.

6. Why are potato chip bags always half-full?

Because husbands are sent out to buy them.

7. What happens to lost socks?

They go to singles bars and pair up with somesock new.

8. Why do people stub their toes on furniture?

Because they walk on their feet. If they walked on their hands, they’d stub their fingers.

9. Who will be the next President?

Whoever can promise the biggest tax cuts to the nation’s multibillionaires.

10. Where did Trump come from?

The gods were playing bridge for high stakes and no one bid no Trump!!!

11. How will Trump’s administration end?

In Hell, hopefully.

12. How do clouds suddenly appear in the sky?

Because they long to be close to you.

13. Why does the universe revolve?

It’s on vacation–just taking a spin around its block.

14. If Time Lords are real, then why haven’t we met any yet?

It isn’t time yet.

15. What is a zombie’s favorite food?

Zombilaya.

 

 

 

For Fibbing Friday, June 16

Smartass Answers For Fibbing Friday, June 9, 2023

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For Fibbing Friday, the Questions (and my answers) are:

  1. You wanted to book a trip to Athens, but the agent misunderstood you…where did they send you?   There was a bit of a spacing error in my request, so they sent me to a poultry farm to look at hens!

2. What will customs agents find in your luggage? My misplaced breakfast sandwich. It was a very early flight!

3. What do you sneak aboard the flight, and what do you sneak it in? My pet snake. I sedated it,  wound it around my waist, gently closed its teeth round its tail and wore it as a snakeskin belt.

4. The plane crashes — everyone survives — where did you crash? In my in-flight dream. 

5. What are three things you find at your crash site? The drink the stewardess delivered to my tray table as I slept, the end of the movie I was watching when I fell asleep and that we had arrived at our destination.

6. What is the first thing you do when you get back home? Check to see if my house sitter ate all of my Costco Vanilla ice cream!!!!

7. The airline offers you money, but you turn it down…what do you get instead? My head examined.

8. You decide that a cruise is safer. Where do you go? Along the Ukraine coast via the Bermuda Triangle.

9. Sadly, you get marooned on a deserted island but find huts and scientific equipment made out of coconuts…what do you do? Look for the trees the scientific equipment came from. I’m hungry.

10. A fishing boat rescues you, but you have to pay Poseidon for safe passage…how do you pay? Trident gum.

11. He rejects your fare and throws you across the world…you land safely, but where do you end up?  I Fallon Nevada. 

12. How does your story end? THE END!!!!

The A to Z Guide to Phobias

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The A to Z Guide to Phobias

Beanophobia: A well-founded fear when they serve baked beans at the banquet before your Jr.prom.
Deanophobia: That long-ago fear in college that you’d be caught sneaking into your dorm after hours.
Geneophobia: The fear that Ancestry.Com will unearth something dastardly in your family tree.
Jeanophobia: Your grandmother’s fear that you’ll show up in shredded jeans for you aunt’s wedding.
Keeneophobia: An unexplainable dislike of Nancy Drew Mysteries.
Leanophobia: An iffy excuse for breaking your diet.
Meanophobia: What keeps you as far away as possible from the snotty group of girls in high school. 
Preenophobia: Your stubborn refusal to sneak into the girls room during the interval of the movie to check out your hair and lipstick.
Queenophobia: A co-occurring disorder suffered by Anti-Anglophiles.
Sceneophobia: That feeling of dread when you let your boyfriend talk you into going to a slasher movie.
Teenophobia: A common phobia suffered by the parents of children between the ages of 12 and 20.
Weanophobia: the reluctance of first-time mothers to give up nursing.
Weeniephobia: A debilitating fear of hot dogs that causes one to avoid fairs and football games.
Xenophobia: An unreasonable dread that one might have been born in 1966 instead of 1965.

No surprise that the  prompt today was Xenophobia, Image by Vadim Bogulov on Unsplash.

 

Answers to Fibbing Friday Questions, Feb 24, 2023

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The assignment: Here are some familiar words but can you make up new definitions for them?

1.   Silicone–a dunce cap
2.   Fluff–a polite word for a gentle fart
3.   Loofah–Scandinavian exclamation or interjection used to express dismay over having to clean the bathroom
4.   Caddy–An eight-year-old rude man in training
5.   Pedantic–funny foot movements while dancing
6.   Tangent–A polite male tourist on a bus back from the beach who gave up his seat to an elderly woman.
7.   Muffler–The mother of a crying baby.
8.   Calamity–Aphids in the Calla lilies
9.   Archive–A cat about to assume its most threatening (and threatened) hump-backed position.
10. Fortify–a poorly-constructed (iffy) structure of defense.

 

For Fibbing Friday Image by Markus Spiske on Unsplash.

“Rolling.” Fibbin’ Black Friday, Nov 26, 2021

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Put the cloves individually into the roller

Here are the Fibbing Friday questions for this week:

1. What is rolling stock? Cattle after they’ve been loaded onto train cars and the train is in motion.
2.  What is a rolling deck ?  A convenient place for rolling doobies on your lap during a poker game.
3.  What is role play ? When actors mess around instead of learning their lines.
4.  What is ‘on a roll? Caraway or sesame seeds, unless it’s a cinnamon roll, in which case it would be frosting.
5.  What does a rolling stone gather?  Carsick groupies.
6.  What is a rolling boil? Whole crab served on a train.
7.  What is a rolling pin? A really bad bowling score.
8.  What is a steam roller? A passé method of curling one’s hair.
9.  What is a roller coaster? A round disk meant to be placed under your drink that has been positioned vertically rather than horizontally.
10. What is a roller skate? A beached fish.

“Fore!!!” Fibbing Friday, Nov 19, 2021

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These are this week’s questions for Fibbing Friday: 

  1. What is an Arnold Palmer?  A golf groupie who can’t keep her hands to herself.
  2. What is a niblick?  An avid writer who is so intent on the tale that she is composing that she forgets that she’s writing with a pen and not a pencil. Licking the pen doesn’t have the same result.
  3. What is a mashie? A potato. The one being mashed.
  4. What’s the difference between a hook and a slice?  One is a pirate and the other is a piece of pizza. The two are not often compared.
  5. What name is given to a single hole score of three under par? An insufficiently stocked vaccination clinic.
  6. What’s a bogey?  Lauren BaCall’s pet name for Humphrey Bogart. Also her pet name for a baloney sandwich.
  7. What’s the difference between a regular golf course and an executive golf course? The dress code.
  8. What unique award is given to the winner of the Masters Tournament? A copy of The Joy of Sex.
  9. Why do golf balls have dimples? No one knows. That’s why golfers scream “For?” before they swing at the ball.
  10. What is the 19th hole? The penultimate dimple on a golf ball.

For Fibbing Friday

Silly Answers: Friday Fibs: March 12, 2021

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Okay, here are my answers for this week’s silly questions!!! Please forgive.

1. Who, or what, is will o’ the wisp?
A very good hairdresser.
2. What is a noggin?
A thimble full of egg nog.
3. What is a bobbin?
An over-active robin.
4. What are otherwise known as crows feet?
Blackbird tootsies.
5. What is jerky?
A wagon ride over train tracks.
6. What is aplomp?
The past tense of Aplomb
7. What is a caricature?
A cartoon drawing of an automobile.
8. What is a misdemeanor?
The orneriest girl in my high school class.
9. What’s the difference between a blimp and a blip?
The letter “M.”
10. What is an arctic roll?
Also called a ski slope: a thin crust covered with icing and a fine powder.

 

For the Fibbing Friday prompt.