Author Archives: lifelessons

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About lifelessons

My blog, which started out to be about overcoming grief, quickly grew into a blog about celebrating life. I post daily: poems, photographs, essays or stories. I've lived in countries all around the globe but have finally come to rest in Mexico, where I've lived since 2001. My books may be found on Amazon in Kindle and print format, my art in local Ajijic galleries. Hope to see you at my blog.

I’ve Come Undone

I’ve Come Undone

If I could undo anything that’s happened in my life,
I would not undo enemies or illnesses or strife.
For all led up to my life now that really isn’t bad.
All given, I am happy, and frequently I’m glad.
My palm trees may need clipping and my dogs may have the mange,
but all in all there’s really only one thing I would change.
I’d undo one tequila or two or three or four.
I think that that is all I drank. I can’t remember more.
And after that, that dance I did as others ringed the floor?
I fear I chose to party when I should have chosen the door!

And that knee I rocked on back and forth, remembering the twist?
I fear I chose to overdo instead of to desist.
My friends did not remove me, but cheered me on instead.
And now I have a throbbing knee and needles in my head.
That knee I’d earlier injured when I fell on cobblestones
had healed, I thought, relieving all that aching in my bones.
But now I’m hobbling back and forth–gimpy once again,
for you gotta pay the piper when you choose a life of sin.
I know my knee will heal and that this agony will end,
but please remind me next time that tequila’s not my friend!!

The Prompt: If you could undo something, what would it be? Discuss why, potential repercussions, or a possible alternative.

Five Foods

Five Foods

The Prompt: If I were marooned on an island with only five foods, what five foods would I choose?

Potatoes, flour, hamburger, lactose-free milk, apples.

What I could make from these five ingredients?

Baked potatoes with butter and sour cream, French fries (alas, no ketchup),  mashed potatoes with milk and butter, potato chips, scalloped potatoes, VODKA!!!!!

Hamburgers in a bun, shepherd’s pie (with potatoes mashed with milk and butter), hamburger and apple scrapple, cream of hamburger soup.

Apple pie, applesauce, apple fritters, sliced apples, apples to bite into, sun dried apples, apple juice, APPLEJACK, APPLE WINE!!!!

What I’d miss most:  Salt (but I figure I could obtain it from seawater), onions (Might they grow wild on the island?), green vegetables, (Surely there are some edible greens on the island?  More likely than wild potatoes or hamburger), and sugar (but perhaps I could sweeten with the apples?)

Although I am lactose-intolerant and do not like the taste of milk itself, I chose lactose-free milk because so many other thinks can be made from it: sour cream, butter for bread and to fry and cook with, cheese. It can be used as an ingredient in pastries, soups, casseroles, breads and drinks. And, I’d need the calcium.

I may live (or may not live, if the choices are wrong) to regret my choices, but thinking of appetite itself and a bit of nutrition as well, these are my choices.  May I never have to live by them.

Here, by the way, is a funny response to this prompt.  I suggest you check out this and other posts on her site:  https://whoison1st.wordpress.com/2015/02/17/pop-tops-baby/

Night Gallery

Night Gallery

They surround me, wall by wall,
so many I can’t name them all.
Paintings of people, things or beasts–
my eyes devour this visual feast.
I sleep beneath each rendered ghost,
the lives of painters caught in most.

A shapely leg with heel inclined–
the painter lying full-reclined
watching his cousin’s shapely wife
reach in the kitchen for a knife.
His teenage mind caught fast in love,
touches the leg and what’s above.

To its side, a fish is rendered.
Its face is human, vaguely gendered.
Does it think or does it dream
as it floats at rest in a somber stream?
The colors muted, it seems at peace.
As though from the world it seeks surcease.

More fish in a smaller frame
float in water that’s not the same.
There’s movement here. The head of one
floats bodyless beneath the sun
of inspiration far above.
Does it dream of art or dream of love?

Farther right, the queen of all.
A stately woman, four feet tall
with birds on shoulders, palms and head,
she’s stood for years above my bed
reminding me that I am free
to be whatever I want to be.

To her right, a tall bookcase
holds ones I love, face after face.
And to its right, a rabbit–eyes
wide open furnish a disguise
for those for whom it is the task
to sleep behind a wooden mask.

Beneath the rabbit, a monkey sits
in landscape full of fruit and pits.
Prosperity and monkeyshine
perhaps leak in as I recline
just feet from totems such as these
to take my nightly dose of ease.

Beneath these animals again
a wide-eyed fish comes swimming in.
Its face is staring nose-to-nose
at a man with eyes closed in repose.
Just the head of man and fish.
I wonder which is dreaming which?

An angel and ex votos four
hang beside my closet door.
One in wood, the others tin,
they simply fill the spare space in.
I keep them there behind my back.
Perhaps they fill in what I lack.

How strange as I’ve said what I see,
I’ve missed the art in front of me.
The Huichole piece painted with thread
with angels floating overhead.
A deer head peering down into
a cauldron of peyote stew.

A bird and man pinned to the wall
to the right, far over all.
Beneath, a woman hung by her heart,
reveals where I both end and start.
It is a sculpture made by me
addressing creativity.

Just one more wall I’ve saved till last–
the hardest one to try to cast
my mind against, for it is hung
with fifteen pieces so far unsung.
But time, I know, is running out.
You’ve other things to read, no doubt,

and yet I simply can’t resist
mentioning them in a list.
Two nudes, a Huichole painting and
ten retablos made by my hand.
An etching plate, painted and framed,
a Victorian child, unknown, unnamed.

These are the walls I’m centered by
as nightly in my bed I lie
and in the morning as I write,
they watch in horror or delight
as my word portraits are unfurled
to grace the walls of a wider world.

You can view images to go with this poem HERE

Note: I’ve actually written today to an earlier prompt Wall to Wall that asked that we write about what is on the walls of our houses and what it reveals about us.  One friend joked that this could keep me busy for years!  I was at the San Miguel Writers’ Conference at the time and hadn’t time to write about anything, let alone a whole house filled with paintings and art and since I woke up before today’s prompt was posted, I decided to fill in the time writing about the earlier prompt. Three hours later, I’ve only finished the task as it describes my bedroom walls, so perhaps I’ll continue at a later date, perhaps not.  I still have today’s prompt to write about, but first…I’ll post this.

Clone Wars Redux

The Prompt:  If you could clone yourself, how would you split up your responsibilities between them?

Since I already wrote a poem that answers this prompt a year ago, I will simply furnish a link to it HERE. I am driving back to San Juan Cosala today and will have time for reflection, so I’ll hopefully do a different post when I get home.

By the way, last night’s talk by Gloria Steinem was incredible, as was the salsa party afterwards.  Yes, the rumors are true.  I did drink four margaritas and do a solo dance center ring on the dance floor, but I was pulled out to do so and solo dancers preceded and followed me, so I was one of a string of spectacles… I shall return to my formerly sedate life as I drive westward today… Or I shall alter my life and dance center ring more frequently in the future.  Wonderful conference.  I’d highly recommend it if you are prone to such things.

San Miguel Images

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Posada de las Monjas, the former convent converted into a hotel, where I always stay when I’m in San Miguel.

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Blankets and pillows spread on the grass for relaxation between sessions at the conference. Nice.

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Plaza Principal in the early evening

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The War of the Words (Love and War)

 The War of the Words

The words packed tight within my mind
seek the empty page.
They fly like hummingbirds and hawks
escaping from their cage.
But when all my empty places
I seek to fill again,
too many words rush in at once,
creating such a din
that nothing can be made of them.
I cannot restore order
in these alien syllables
that flood across my border.

I did not think these previous lines.
They just crept up on me.
I place them here upon the page
and thereby set them free.
They have no place within my head
where I had plans to write
a valentine or love poem.
Instead, they spar and fight.
One trying to beat the others
to the front line of my mind.
Love words elbowing their way
through “sensitive” and “kind.”

So shyness steps on anger’s toes
and sloth runs out of steam
trying to reclaim the place
where words like it must dream.
I no longer know the purpose
that I set out upon
I fear the mood is broken–
my concentration gone.
The thought that any love poem
will come is now absurd.
Ten minutes ago I was in love,
but now I have been cured!!

The Prompt: Write an Ode to something or someone you love. Bonus points for poetry.

Happy Valentine’s Day!!!!!

Greatest Things

The Prompt: Most of us have heard the saying, ‘That’s the best thing since sliced bread.”  What do you think is actually the best thing since sliced bread?

Priorities

One thought swirls around my head.
What’s so great about sliced bread?
Its fame is just a piece of bunk.
I’d rather just tear off a chunk.
There are other things about
that are much harder to do without.
Toilet paper is number one.
Life gets quite grim when there is none.
Without ketchup, fries taste bland,
and lest we all get over-tanned,
best keep sunscreen close at hand.
A shot of rum is just a joke
unless submerged in Diet Coke!
So let’s get our priorities right.
Just grab a loaf and take a bite!!!!

Finally, a bit of time to post.  I’ve missed it.  Tomorrow I have nothing scheduled in the morning, so hopefully I’ll be able to post then as well.  Richard Blanco gave a wonderful reading yesterday..Gloria Steinem speaks Sunday.  So many good workshops and readings and speakers here at the San Miguel Writers’ Conference.  If you can, give it a try next year.

First Light

Write a post about the first thought you had this morning.

First Light

I’m in San Miguel de Allende for a writers’ conference.  For the past few weeks it has been rush rush with a number of deadlines and obligations, then a day to pack and attend to a number of duties before I left and then a six and a half hour drive, alone, using a route I was not too sure of.  Luckily, I only got lost once and enroute was able to listen to the entire book, Revolution from Within by Gloria Steinem, one of the conference presenters.

So, when I woke up this morning, my first thought was to glance at the alarm clock, set for 7 a.m.  The room was still dark, thanks to the opaque shades, but the 6:44 glowed out in brilliant red large numbers from my bedside.  No chance to write to the prompt today and not even any time to post at all.  I turned off the alarm, showered, discovered I’d forgotten to pack my toothbrush, climbed the two flights of stairs to the cold dining room and ordered oatmeal and papaya, then drove across town to the conference site.

Since then it has been rush rush rush all day, carrying a too-heavy computer (I’ll leave it home tomorrow) and a big box of books for the book tent that I couldn’t find time to take in…Finally, I’m rid of them and any obligation for the next half hour or so, so I’m lying on a blanket on the grass behind the hotel, actually writing electronically for the first time today.  Too far away from the first thoughts of the day to remember what they were.  Too tired to try to fabricate them.

Alice Walker will be speaking in half an hour.  A few hours ago, Tracy Chevalier, the author of “The Girl With the Pearl Earring,” gave a wonderful talk on historical fiction. Hard to go away from these conferences with any faith in your own writing at all after hearing the words of such iconic writers.  So I turn back to the comfort of my blog, and you who read me, feeling snug in this safe world.  Thanks for being a part of it.

Pictures to follow later….

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/first-light/

Sweet Clover

Sweet Clover

Before our dad told us its real name,
we used to call it wild mustard.
What did we know about sweet clover except for its color
and that summer smell, cloying in its sugared perfume.
It filled the air and smothered the plains—
bright yellow and green where before
brown stubble had peeked through blown snow.

On these dry lands, what flowers there were
tended to be cash crops or cattle feed.
Sweet clover or alfalfa.
The twitching noses of baby rabbits brought home by my dad
as we proffered it to them by the handful.
Fragile chains we draped around our necks and wrists.
Bouquets for our mom
that wilted as fast as we could pick them.

Summers were sweet clover and sweet corn
and first sweethearts parked on country roads,
windows rolled down to the night air,
then quickly closed to the miller moths.
Heady kisses,
whispered confessions, declarations,
unkept promises.
What we found most in these first selfish loves
was ourselves.

The relief of being chosen
and assurance that all our parts worked.
Our lips accepting those pressures unacceptable
just the year before.
Regions we’d never had much congress with before
calling out for company.
That hard flutter
like a large moth determined to get out.
Finding to our surprise,
like the lyrics of a sixties song,
that our hearts could break, too.

Hot summer nights,
“U”ing Main,
cars full of boys honking
at cars full of girls.
Cokes at Mack’s cafe.
And over the whole town
that heavy ache of sweet clover.
Half promise, half memory.
A giant invisible hand
that covered summer.

 

The Prompt: The Transporter—Tell us about a sensation — a taste, a smell, a piece of music — that transports you back to childhood.

The World Is Too Much With Us

People here are funny. They work so hard at living they forget how to live.”
Mr. Deeds Goes to Town (1936)

The World Is Too Much With Us

How was life when we didn’t know everything?  Back when there was no TV and when news got shared once a day on the radio and once on the door stoop in the morning?  We were so busy with our own lives that we didn’t spend every minute of every day bound up in the ills of the world.

Violence was a neighborhood game of cops and robbers, but nobody really ever identified more with the robbers.  It was more a game like kick the can, where you were trying to keep something away from the other side.  Violence was not the point and when I look deep, I know that a game of cowboys and Indians was no more an expression of prejudice than listening to a World Series game of the Yankees against the Dodgers was.

To rephrase a quote from Mr. Deeds Goes to Town (1936), I have to say that people of the twenty-first century are funny.  They work so hard at living they forget how to live. I include myself in their ranks.  I am so tied to my computer that I panicked recently when I spilled a Coke on it and had to go a few days without.  My day felt strangely empty even though I had an entire ocean and beach spread out before me and a small town full of people to talk to, a porch full of art materials.  But, I’d become so accustomed to my blogging world and even to talking throughout the day via Skype to a very dear friend, that I didn’t know what to do with a day that was just a day in one place with one set of people around me.

Existence has become a thing that has no value unless I can write about it and I don’t seem to be able to write anymore unless I am writing into a computer and sending experience out into the world.  I am committing, perhaps, even more of a sin than those teenagers glued to their hand devices, texting their friends. They, at least, are connected to someone,  whereas I simply talk to my computer and send out copies later.

Who is most at fault is not the point.  The point is that connection with the world at large that keeps some of us from a simple and private connection to the world immediately around us.  We know so much about so many things we really don’t have much control over, that we have become voyeurs. The entire world has become grounds for our gossip.  We are fascinated by the gory details, shocked but in a sort of fascinated daze that keeps us many times from realizing that this is more than a movie. This is reality.  Someone’s pain.  We feel it for those seconds and minutes and hours and days that the horrible action stays in the headlights of this rushing vehicle that is our world, but then we pass on and it is as though one program has ended and the next begins.  We think about world events in episodes.  Off with the old one, on with the newest slaughter or murder or coup or genocide or monster storm or hostage situation.

In the meantime the minor tragedies around us sometimes go unnoticed.  We are so fixated on the stories of major tragedies on the other side of the world that we forget the real people and small dramas going on around us.  We watch nature shows on television while ignoring what wildlife still exists around us.   We suffer the passion and pangs of romance as onlookers.  Observing the great chefs of the world takes up time we could have been baking chocolate chip cookies.  Watching Honey Boo Boo in horror becomes a punishment in comparison to  sitting in a playground, watching children living the world in real time.

Yes, what I write is hyperbole, but I think it is true, to a varying degree, of most of us connected to the technical world. It is like a horrible accident passed on the hightway that we are told by our mothers to look away from.  Who can resist?  No matter how much the gory scene may invade our dreams and turn them into nightmares, we cannot look away. And now with TV and the Internet, we could spend 24 hours a day watching such horrors. And often do.

There is such a thing as being too connected to too large a world.  This is why I disconnected the dish network and cable years ago.  The bad news still leaks through, as does the good news, but in quantities I can take and that leave time for real experience and a perhaps misplaced faith in the world and human goodness and yes, even my own goodness.  I am beginning to try to spend more time away from the computer–to simplify, if that is possible in this busy cluttered mess of a life I’ve once more collected around me.

I find the valuable elements slipping away and less energy to collect more around me.  Friends die and move away both physically or emotionally.  This is the process of life.  But it is also the process of life to stay engaged in a real way and to fight for meaning and value in our lives.  This should not be so hard.  There should not be so much to plow through to get to ourselves and what is really important.  The Mr. Deeds quote, in modern context, might be altered to read, “We work so hard at observing and being in contact with the world at large  that  we forget how to live in that world.”

The Prompt: Silver Screen–Take a quote from your favorite movie — there’s the subject of your post. Now, write!