Category Archives: Humor

Fibbing Friday

This week’s Fibbing Friday prompts cover topics musical:

Familiar songs this week, but who do you think could do a ‘cover’…… it doesn’t have to be a singer, so use your imagination and creativity for the next chart topper………… or flop.

1. I am the One and Only. Donald Trump
2. These Boots are made for Walking. A duet by John Wayne and Puss in Boots.
3. Help Yourself. The British Empire.
4. Make me an Island. Simon & Garfunkel’s recording company. 
5. I want to know what Love is. Romeo & Juliet, another duet.
6. Penny Lane. Tom Waits (See illustration above.)
7. I Heard it Through the Grapevine. The notorious town gossip
8. I close my eyes and count to ten. Your mother, after issuing a command
9. Knock Three Times. Your hard-of-hearing mother.
10. Let me Entertain You. Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift’s Grandma’s Apologia for Staying At Home and Watching It All On TV

Baby, I’d love to go ice-skating with you, but even in my teens, I couldn’t manage to stand up on blades to propel myself over frozen water. Besides that, I heard a rumor that they’d be there shooting a promo for your new album, and even in my salad days, I was frightened of cameras, so imagine me facing them now!

Esther’s Challenge: Can you tell a story in 61 words, using these words? (Photo assistance from AI.)

  • BABY
  • ICE-SKATING
  • ALBUM
  • SALAD
  • FRIGHT
  • CAMERA

“Judy’s Silly Answers” For Fibbing Friday

Daffynitions for Fibbing Friday this week are:

1. What is an heirloom? An heirloom is device  used to weave cloth and tapestry that is inherited from a parent or grandparent.
2. What is The Big Dipper? A “Big Dipper” is that most generous employee of your favorite ice cream parlor whose line you always make sure you get into.
3. What is a titfer?  Fer feeding babies.
4. What is a mud flap? That center tongue that covers up the center gap in lace-up or buckle-up overshoes.
5. What is a barrel roll? The piece of bread that comes in the largest bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken.
6. Why did Polly want a cracker? She was tired of her elite northern boyfriend.
7. What is meant by ‘trip the light fantastic?’ To stick one’s foot out in front of Bobby Fulton or Tommy Rogers after their weigh-in before the fight to make the skinniest one stumble as they passed by.
8. What is a diffuser? In Mexico, it is someone who applies to the National System for Integral Family Development for aid for their family. (DIF is a Mexican public institution of social assistance that focuses on strengthening and developing the welfare of the Mexican families.)
9. What is a valet? An especially short  low area of land between hills or mountains, typically with a river or stream flowing through it.
10. What is a noggin? It is usually located between the shoulders, but can also be located in a liquor cabinet.

A Regal Final Breath, for RDP Wednesday

greg-daines-1376875-unsplash
Her Highness Contemplates A Seemly End

Nobility in dying is something I shan’t botch,
for I know it shall be one that the whole wide world will watch.
I cannot go by fire, for I’m sure I would be screaming
as the water quenched the fire and set my flesh to steaming.

So unseemly and so crass. I’d find it unappealing.
So, too, a rope around my neck, hanging from the ceiling.
Jumping from a roof won’t do. Nor will a gun nor pills.
Every sort of suicide just sports too many ills.

It’s clear that death by avalanche is the only one
that will really suit me when the day is done.
A certain swift clean fall of snow seems such a pristine death.
A queenly mode of dying. Such a regal final breath!

For RDP Wednesday the prompt is REGAL

Must admit that I am rerunning a poem I wrote for RDP six years ago. At that time the prompt was was “avalanche”, but as you can see, the poem works for “regal” as well!

Reblog of Poem Published in 2019 Mistakenly Attributed to Dr. Seuss with Note from the Real Author

Screen Shot 2019-09-21 at 10.01.58 AM.png

Just today, Nov 4, 2025, I received this message from “Handy Barker” concerning this poem he wrote, which was quoted as a Dr. Seuss poem everywhere I could find it, or I would have attributed it to him. Here is the note I received from him, which I am publishing along with my apology:

Again, sorry, Handy…

Purse Supplies, for Cellpic Sunday

I know this is a very weird photo which is why I had to include it instead of the one I’d planned.  I read my poetry at a twice-monthly large reading at a local hotel/patio restaurant on Friday which was Halloween, and when I returned to my seat,  I noticed everyone at my table had a white stick sticking out of their mouth and then noticed  this  little sucker on the table in front of my chair. Unnoticed by me, the reader before me had delivered Halloween treats to each table, so I tucked mine into my purse with my pens. Only later when I opened the flap of my purse, did I see it nestled in with other “necessaries.” I couldn’t resist snapping a photo. 

for Cellpic Sunday

Halloween Humor for Fibbing Friday

For Fibbing Friday, the definition task at hand is:

  1. Why does garlic repel vampires? It throws off their sense of smell, thus no “Fee fi fo fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman!.”
  2. What do you need to kill a werewolf? The present tense.
  3. What is the purpose of a Jack-o-lantern? To enable one to see to change a tire in the dark.
  4. What exactly is a ghoul? A rental trailer for ghosts.
  5. Why can’t vampires enter a home unless invited? Vampire etiquette.
  6. Why can’t vampires cross running water? Because they can’t catch it.
  7. What does a chupacabra eat? Father snakes.
  8. What is the name of the three-headed dog that guards the gates of the underworld? The Three Dog Knight
  9. Who are the Stygian Witches? Witches who hog all the brew.
  10. What alcoholic beverage is thought to be the true origin of witches’ brew? Any distilled “spirit.”

 

More Fibs for Fibbing Friday

 

A Jailed Jiminy

The task for Fibbing Friday this week is to define:
1. Ripsnorter: A surfer joke.
2. Rinky-dink: A very small skating arena
3. Rapscallion: A green onion served in a buffet at the end of filming.
4. Recalcitrant: Describing someone about to go back onto their diet. 
5. Rickrack: Lucillle Ball’s bosom.
6. Rut-roh: Slang for Canoeing the Colorado River
7. Redonkulous: A scarlet buttercup
8. Rammy: Da da’s Mama
9. Rickety-crickety: A decaying zoo enclosure for insects
10. Roodle: A tasteless piece of pasta

“Firm Ground” for Ragtag Daily Press

 

Firm Ground

Between all of you and me,
I’ve no experience with scree.
Given the type of ground to walk on,
scree’s the surface I would balk on.
Other folks may be adventurous.
My choice is usually ventureless!

The RDP prompt is “scree.”  (Image borrowed from the RDP prompt site.)

Dental Retaliation

Dental Retaliation

Do you remember toothbrushes lined up on a rack
in the medicine cabinet, at the mirror’s back?
Your father’s brush was ocean blue, your mother’s brush was green,
your sister’s brush the reddest red that you had ever seen,
whereas your brush’s handle had no color at all—
as though it was the ugliest sister at the ball.

How you yearned for color, reaching for your brush
as the first summer’s meadowlark called to break the hush
of the early morning while you were sneaking out
to be the first one out-of-doors to see what was about.
Making that fast decision, your hand fell on the red,
thinking your sister wouldn’t know, for she was still abed.

You put toothpaste upon it, wet it at the tap
and ran the brush over each tooth as well as every gap.
Each toothbrush flavor was different, your older sis had said,
so you thought it would be different brushing your teeth with red.
Your father’s brush was blueberry, your mother’s brush was mint.
Your sister’s luscious cherry—its flavor heaven-sent.

“But because you are adopted,” your sister had the gall
to tell you, “they gave you the brush with no flavor at all.”
You waited to taste cherries, but that taste never came.
That red brush tasted like toothpaste. It tasted just the same
as every other morning when you brushed with yours.
You heard your sister stir upstairs, the squeaking of the floors.

You toweled off her toothbrush and hung it in the rack
and started to run out the door. Then something brought you back.
You opened up the mirror and grabbed her brush again.
A big smile spread across your face—a retaliatory grin.
The dread cod liver oil stood on the tallest shelf.
You were barely big enough to reach it for yourself.

You dipped her toothbrush in it, then quickly blew it dry.
Replaced it, shut the cabinet, and when you chanced to spy
your own reflection in the glass, each of you winked an eye.
Then you ran out to cherry trees to catch the first sunbeam
and brush your teeth with cherries while you listened for her scream.

(Not a true story, by the way!!!)

 

For One Word Sunday the prompt is “Teeth.” Image created with help from AI.