Mismatched
By what draconian measures might you cure your spouse of snoring?
No amount of pushing, shoving, poking, shouting, roaring
will rouse him from his sleep, and it does no good to smudge him.
No pungent fumes from spruce or sage can do a thing to budge him.
As maddening as a girl might find a husband who is boring,
there is no match more irritating than one prone to snoring.
Prompt words today are it, spouse, draconian, spruce, push and pungent.
We’ll Be Having S’mores!
He’ll rid the cupboards of food he abhors
and refurbish them with the makings for s’mores:
marshmallows, Hershey bars and then for backers,
he’ll purchase a surplus of packs of graham crackers.
A triple pleasure, this snack is the star
of any snack found in packet or jar.
Let the unimaginative shop in stores
for pre-made snacks. He’ll be serving us s’mores!
Prompt words today are triple, unimaginative, marshmallow, refurbish, star, surplus. Photos by Autumn Mott and Jessica Rusce on Unsplash.
Cantankerous
Grandpa is displaying his usual disposition,
expressing all his anger with excessive exposition.
He’s feeling most litigious and says that all the dang
liberals and Democrats should be sentenced to hang!
To Hell with all the secrecy. Sound the fire sirens
and lynch all left wing voters found in our environs.
If it were up to him they’d draw and quarter, limb-from-limb
every gol-durn voter who does not vote like him!
Prompt words today are hang, litigious, secrecy, disposition, sound. Image by Charles Buchler on Unsplash.
Fiction, Dolly!!!!
Parting Manifesto
All the reasons you have vetted
(reasons I should feel indebted)
are reasons that I question, so,
I can’t accept your tales of woe.
Those monstrous acts you say I’ve done?
It is a fact that I’ve done none.
And all the things you say you’ve bought?
The fact is that I bought the lot!
Your bags are packed and by the door.
Load up that sports car you adore
and take yourself right down the road.
I’m closing up the mother lode!
For, though I’ll miss our hugs and smooching,
I won’t miss your constant mooching.
It’s time you joined the teeming mob,
got off your keister and got a job!!!!
Prompt words today are question, indebted, monstrous, like.
Christmas: A New Rendition
That the papers had a field day is totally explicable,
“Santa Stuck in the Chimney and for Hours Inextricable!”
So now he’s on a diet. No more cookies, no more milk.
He’s restricted to mere salads and others of their ilk.
He’s feeling way less boisterous. No more “Ho ho ho’s!”
So there’ll be fewer miracles in our stockings’ toes.
That year the Grinch stole Christmas just might be repeated
and socks hung on the mantel might have to be re-feeted.
Prompt words today are field day, inextricable, fireplace, boisterous, miracle and rendition.
Mosquito Bump Blues
This strain of mosquito is so sanctimonious
because it claims its droning is indeed harmonious.
According to their drone master, they drone in harmony
depending on their sting site: ear or arm or knee!
They’re trying to get a copyright on harmonies they’ve written
according to locations simultaneously bitten,
but alas they don’t write music so they cannot win the rights
to music just recorded by the pattern of their bites!
Prompt words today are mosquito, strain, sanctimonious, according, copyright. Image by Jimmy Chan on Pexel.
Avant Garde
I fear that this designer puts good taste to the test.
I’m flabbergasted at his color scheme and all the rest.
He is my boss, so if you will, kindly do not quote me.
The last thing that I need is for the fool to demote me.
In spite of any influence that I might have exerted,
It seems that in the end, the plans have all reverted
to the plans he started out with, so the building has been skirted
in lattice and in felt. Alas, it has been yurted!!!!
Prompts today are: rest, flabbergasted, designer, poise, quote and inserted.
Period of Adjustment
(Can of Worms)
Even the giants of the ocean must come up to find air.
As the bell sounds and each of us is off to a new table,
it is another indication of the extent of our sanity.
Memories like this reveal the boy within the man,
enough so you can handle caring for a pup—
a tight knot in her cushy denim bed just a yard away.
Those are traits she got from you, and certainly not me—
a small-town landlocked jungle girl.
But if you lay off my breakfast, I’ll cook you your own waffle!
I guess I’ll go eat worms.
(If he’s the one I married, you can bet that he can buy them,)
By the time I’m twenty, I’ll grow out of it,
our break mended by a solid golden band,
and we can dine on tunafish straight out of a can!!!
Little foibles seen in review.
And though our story is not over,
for now this is “The End!”
For dVerse Poets, we were to take the last lines of twelve of our poems and to create a poem out of them. Yes, mine is a “bit” strange, but then so were all of the poems I took them from. Blame it on the prompt words. I always do.
Disgruntled
When I try to crack the whip and get the world in line,
somehow it turns fractious and starts to buck and whine.
Electrons turn to protons and refuse to whirl about.
The sun refuses to come out and stays inside to pout.
Berries stain my shirt front and seeds stick in my teeth.
Feral felines storm my bed and find solace beneath.
Friends offer consolation that is but a token.
There is little impact in the words that they have spoken.
If only things would go the way I’ve formed them in my mind,
there would be fewer problems in his daily grind;
but the world won’t listen and goes about its day
with very little interest in what I have to say.
No one will believe me when I say that I’ve evolved
to the point where the world’s problems I have mainly solved.
They go about their business like before I came along,
doing things without me and doing most things wrong.
They prefer those idiots who have run the Earth
slowly bleeding all of us as they increased their girth.
So until the world at large decides to meet my terms
and decide to love me, I guess I’ll go eat worms!!!!
Prompt words today are electron, token, fractious, impact, stain. I know I need a new disgruntled photo as I’ve maybe overused this one, but it’s a busy day and this one just seems to work, so….
Monolingual
Your language is not plain enough.
I do not get this “jibbing” stuff.
It angers me to have to look
these sailing terms up in a book.
Perhaps you are too lofty for
a small town landlocked jungle girl?
Prompt words today are jib, plain, anger, lofty, jungle.
Just for the fun of it, I wrote this poem line-by-line as I looked up the new prompt word without knowing what the next one was. I sort of got led down the proverbial password path!
lifelessons - a blog by Judy Dykstra-Brown 