Joke of the Day: 1969 vs. 2019

1969 vs. 2019 (A span of only 50 YEARS)
1969 : Long hair
2019 : Longing for hair
196 9 : KEG
2019 : EKG
196 9 : Acid rock
2019 : Acid reflux
1969 : Moving to California because it’s cool
2019 : Moving to Arizona because it’s warm
1969 : Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2019 : Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1969 : Seeds and stems
20 19 : Roughage
1969 : Hoping for a BMW
2019 : Hoping for a BM
1969 : Going to a new, hip joint
2019 : Receiving a new hip joint
1969 : Rolling Stones
2019 : Kidney Stones
1969 : Passing the drivers’ test
2019 : Passing the vision test
Do you feel old yet?
Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list.
(Notice the larger type that’s for those of you who have trouble reading.)
So have a nice day!!!
It is good to have friends who know about these things and are still alive and kicking!!!
This was sent to me by friends who received it from Tim Sparks. I’m not sure if he wrote it and as I couldn’t find it on Google, I can’t attribute it. Had to pass it on, however..

Beach Bomb

Click on photos to enlarge.

I was at my favorite beach–La Manzanilla, in Mexico, minding my own business, enjoying a wonderful sunset, when I came upon this man sitting in a chair out in the surf–sipping a margarita!  I made a passing remark as I passed, and the next thing I knew, he was leaving his chair, pulling me over to it, sitting me down and handing me his margarita. “Give me your camera,” he said. “I’ll take your photo.”  As he did, I didn’t really notice the woman out in the surf, but by the time he’d snapped a couple of photos, she had made her appearance–and, yup, bombed my photo! She gave us a back view, too, but figured none of the guys would want to see it.

 

For Friday Fun-Beach

Fallen Beauty, African Tulip Tree, Aug 22, 2020

Click on photos to enlarge.

Situation re/California Fires

The view from our front porch in Boulder Creek
This report was sent to me Friday night by Liz Jensen, who lives in Bonny Doon, in the mountains near Boulder Creek, CA, where I lived for 14 years before moving to Mexico. They have evacuated the five towns in the San Lorenzo Valley where I lived, plus folks in the mountains around. So sad. Here is Liz’s report:
Good morning everyone. I listen to the 0600 Cal Fire briefing this morning and thought I would provide an update here. Lots of information so bear with me if some of it is a little confusing.
Summary first: there were 11000 + lightning strikes in the tropical storm that came through. There were 370 fire starts. 13 turned into large Fires at the state level.
State calfire is doing triage at the state level allocating incoming fire personnel from other states based on multiple assessments – danger to public, critical infrastructure Etc and then sending out Personnel based on that analysis.
State inmate Cruz are down due to  Covid. those that remain are being allocated between the 13 major fires. All emergency personnel are stretched too thin due to the large number of fires. The state is looking at the National Guard but has not yet made a decision to call them up. They are not trained firefighters but can do support to the fire teams.
Now onto the San Mateo Santa Cruz Monterey Bay Area.
There are three major fires burning in our area. The Carmel fire has 700 Personnel, the river fire has 780 personnel and the fire is 34000 Acres, and the Santa Cruz lightning complex fire which currently has 1000 personnel.
They now have more personnel and are doing hard closures to keep people out. Right now there’s a road closure at Highway 1 and Schaefer Road Felton Empire is closed and Felton Empire and Empire Grade at Jameson and Alba.
Currently the Santa Cruz Fire is at 50,000 Acres, 64,000 people have been evacuated 50 homes have been destroyed officially but they expect that to go into triple digits.
The most active fire front is on the Eastern flank near Boulder Creek and Ben Lomond. They are now starting to establish a fire line to protect Santa Cruz and UCSC. UCSC is now evacuated and the report is that the fire is one mile north at Twin gates but is spotty in that area.
As for conditions, this is a historic fire burning in ways not previously encountered. They really want to keep people out so they can work on establishing perimeters rather than defending people who have stayed home to fight fires in their neighborhood. With scarce resources they want to put personnel where they can do the most good to stop forward progression.
I have no comment on this as I know many brave people are staying to defend homes and neighborhoods. I am just reporting what was in the briefing this morning.
 Aircraft still can’t fly over to do fire drops because the smoke is laying low and they can’t see fire underneath it. We currently have the worst air quality in the world and people are recommended to stay inside as much as possible.
The next 2 days are going to be more favorable 4 suppressing the fire because of higher humidity due to fog and lower wind speeds. However after that conditions turn unfavourable again.
Okay that’s my update. I took notes take everything with a grain of salt as the situation is extremely fluid and changing all the time. Good luck to everyone and stay safe.

Designer Diets

Designer Diets

I’m in need of a diet in front and behind,
yet I cannot survive on such food as the kind
that dieting gurus decree I must chew
like all of the reigning glamor queens do.

Designer lettuce and parsley and kale
with a soupcon of dressing is what they inhale.
They do not eat Oreos, bon bons or gummies.
They deterge their colons and staple their tummies.

No carbohydrates of any kind
will they order in diners, even in a bind.
And so they go hungry, albeit they’re svelte,
but I think I would rather just loosen my belt.

 

Prompts today are surviving, design, soupcon, deterge and kind.

Virginia Creepers: FOTD, Aug 21, 2020

Yes, the vine is a Virginia Creeper, but it hides creepers of a different variety. They are hornworms–the larvae of the hummingbird moth. Every year around this time they come here to dine on the Virginia Creeper, which would be no problem except for the little round balls of excretions they leave all over my terrace and patio table. We find and relocate them to the spare lot. Since the patterns on the four colors of larvae are the same, I’ve always thought they are stages of coloration of the one caterpillar. The fourth color is vivid green. I’ve done blogs on them before. I can find no mention of this elsewhere, although I have seen the larvae pictured on the internet in all of the colors except red. At the largest stage, they are 3 to 4 inches long.

For Cee’s FOTD

Copa de Oro Flower: FOTD, Aug 20, 2020

 

 

For Cee’s FOTD

Coming Clean about Hydroychloroquine

Click on link below to read article:

https://www.newsweek.com/coming-clean-about-hydroxychloroquine-opinion-1526225?utm_source=pushnami&utm_medium=Push_Notifications&utm_campaign=automatic&UTM=1597929316825

Creeping Shadows

Creeping Shadows

I have no wish to classify shadowy explorations—
furtive trips to low-life bars or questionable vacations.
I’m aloof in my present. I don’t think about my past.
I have no need to dwell upon times more overcast.
In past attempts to deal with them, I tried to rearrange them
to find they only frustrate me because I cannot change them.

Still, memory’s tyranny will win. I can’t escape, it seems.
Those shadows banished in the day creep back into my dreams.

 

Prompt words today are shadowy explorations, classify, aloof, frustrate and tyranny.

Retribution

Retribution

I swallow screams for dinner,
hold my tongue the whole meal through.
I’m told I’ll have to eat my words
if I let slip a few.
I’m choking back the clever things
that I want to tell,
but all my smart rejoinders
simply will not jell.

“Better seen than heard,” they say,
and yet they do not see me.
If I’m not allowed to speak,
how will I ever be me?
When I grow up, I’ll talk and talk.
Never will I be quiet.
If someone tries to shut me up,
I simply will not buy it.

By then my folks will be real old.
To shush me? They won’t dare.
If they do, I’ll shush them back, 
and put them in a chair.
I’ll make them face the corner
and tell them to be quiet.
And if they say to eat my words?
I’ll say I’m on a diet!!!

 

For Poets and Storytellers United. Swallow Screams