Tag Archives: silly poem

Bride’s First Meal

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Bride’s First Meal

It was a layered casserole of maize and squash and beans
whose contents were indigenous and well within her means.
She blanched and drained and layered in a metal pan.
She followed all directions and plotted out each plan.

Dabbing on her favorite essence, she donned his favorite dress.
With the front door open, she didn’t have to guess
when he was walking up the lane and so she would be able
to greet him with a soulful kiss and dinner on the table.

But, her first endeavor which she’d hoped would be delicious,
in fact was not ambrosial, but instead pernicious.
It seemed as though the entire dish might be having troubles
as it rose above its boundaries with ominous pops and bubbles.

In short,

These were the things that went amiss
after his entrance and their kiss.
She rued the day that dish was born.
The squash was tough, as was the corn.

Instead they went to Burger King
and ordered one of everything,
came on home and gorged on it,
so their first meal was quite a hit.

She pitched her failed attempt within
a nearby waiting rubbish bin.
She was smart and so good looking.
He didn’t wed her for her cooking.

 

Prompt words today are ambrosial, endeavor, indigenous, essence, metal and lane.

Familial Disapproval

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Familial Disapproval

When he swears when the champagne cork hits him in the eye,
my brother’s new fiancee utters a “My, my!”
then swipes the bubbles from her upper lip with  polite tongue.
(She’s squeamish about swear words and she calls the cork a “bung.”)

Her brow furls with referrals to anything unsavory.
(She prefers her history minus genocide or slavery.)
“If you can’t say something good, then don’t say anything at all.”
she says, and then says little but “Oh, really?” and “Y’all!!!”

She’s a proper southern girl with mild disposition.
She would not think to put you out or cause an imposition,
yet when I ask if she is hungry, she admits, “Yes, just a bit,”
and when I put the tea cake out, she eats three-fourths of it!

She never wastes her precious time when visiting by sitting
and conversing with the family. Instead, she brings her knitting,
and bottom lip between her teeth, she counts her knit and pearling.
concentrating on her knitting needles’ rhythmic twirling. 

You might surmise she’s not my favorite, or second, third or fourth
girlfriend he has brought home from East and West and North.
This Southern girl sticks in my craw, I just cannot get used to her.
And you can bet I’m dreading the day my bro’ gets fused to her.

Prompt words on this Solstice morning are: hunger, disposition, squeamish, bung, referral and knitting.

A Cherry Perfect Birthday

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A Cherry Perfect Birthday

Tomorrow we will celebrate my sixth year jubilee
with a little party just for my family.
Grandma’s going to catentate
cherries and lard and flour
and add a bit of sugar to make the fruit less sour,
then proceed to put it in the oven to cook up
into my favorite cherry pie upon which we will sup.
Thus will fruit and grain and fat conspire to create
a birthday treat the thoughts of which make me salivate.
Birds may like cherries in the wild directly off the tree,
but baked into my grandma’s pie tastes way better to me!!!!

Prompts for today are: jubilee, proceed, pastry, catenate (to join together), bird and grain.

Miss Cleanjeans

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Miss Cleanjeans

I love I love I love I love my boyfriend’s laundromat.
My clothes go in so dirty and come out looking pat.
You might find it lamentable that I do not pay.
I promise that I’ve tried to, but he says “No way!”
I’m timid as a lemur, so I do not protest.
In all of these matters, I know that he knows best.
Part of my lovey-doveyness is that I must concur
with everything he says or does, for I am so demure
that I can’t launch objections to anything he does.
My very simple reason? I can’t do it “because.”

 

 

For this week’s prompt, the letter is “L.”
Place – laundromat
Emotion – lovey-doveyness
Adjective – lamentable
Verb – launch
Animal – lemur

For A Letter A Week Prompt

Headline News

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Headline News

I think for a week or two that I will remain
tucked away within the walls of my own domain.
That I made the headlines was flattering, more or less,
but the fact that I’ve turned sexy was a misprint, you might guess.
Still, so many have indulged their need for jokes at my expense
that I have had to seize this means to come to my defense.
Though my physical condition is healthy, fit and agile,
I find my sense of humor is becoming rather fragile.

It is “sixty” I turned yesterday, not “sexy” as reported.
Years have passed since I was so venereally comported.
My past generosity in spreading love around
I left back in the sixties and since then I have found
that piety becomes me, so I’ve trod another path,
thus, you’ll understand my embarrassment and wrath
at what some find as funny and so I took the action
of insisting that the paper issue a retraction.

But the form of their retraction, I must say, I found unkind.
The headline I’m not sexy was not what I had in mind.

Prompts today are.: domain,  indulge, agile, misprint and  generous,   Image by Ivan Aleksic on Unsplash.

Fleeced and Avenged

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Fleeced and Avenged

When first my antagonist burst upon the scene,
he was an enterprising human sales machine.
I was his favorite client, an accomplishment for sure—
innocent and gullible and open to the lure.
I had little experience foreshadowing the end.
No idea at all what lay waiting ’round the bend.
But I fear his achievement was unduly brief,
because Daddy called the sheriff, declaring him a thief.
Now he’s living in the jailhouse and his board and room is free.
He’s living on the county now—not on little old me!

 

Today’s prompts are achievement, foreshadow, antagonist, enterprise, burst and accomplishment.  Image from Pinterest.

Kangaroo Coup

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Kangaroo Coup

I scored a knockout in Kentucky against a kangaroo.
Before he aimed his kick at me, I simply staged a coup.
I could have killed with kindness, but  I chose not to do it
because I knew that if I did, I’d very likely rue it.

 

For A Letter A Week: The Letter “K”
Image by Graham Holshausen on Unsplash.

Place – kentucky

Emotion – kindness

Adjective – knockout

Verb – kick

My animal – kangaroo

“To Do”

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My real “To Do” pile!!!
See this ‘to do” list? Does it happen to have feeding time on it?

Click on photos to enlarge and read commentary.

“To Do”

My networking agenda is getting rather full,
and I feel much-encumbered by its towering pull.
File after file lined up row on row,
I encounter my “to do” pile everywhere I go.

If I were more resourceful, I would have got them done,
Instead I follow other paths and thus accomplish none.
My list grows longer by the day, yet I ignore its flow
streaming off my desktop onto the floor below.

If I allow defection and follow unplanned whims,
wasting time in tidepools and swinging off of limbs,
what do I care if niftier friends do as their lists insist.
There’s more to life than what I’ve written up on any list.

 

Prompt words for today are : nifty, resourceful, network, list, encumbered, flow.

Cattails

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Click on photos to enlarge.


Dogs and Cats

My dogs are fun and gnarly and love to leap and play.
Often their wild antics are the climax of my day.
They love to solve dilemmas such as who is passing by
by raising choruses of barks and howls up to the sky.
But when it comes to relaxation, my kitties take the cake.
Their main activity, the patterns that their cattails make.

For Zoe’s response to this subject, go here: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/illgm2yxMfg

Prompts today are cattail, climax, dilemma, cake, gnarly .

Family Heirlooms

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Family Heirlooms

It’s apparent I’m replaceable. At least it is the shout
that you moved in my replacement as soon as I moved out.
I hope that you remember as you stroll down your new path
that your former roadway contains an aftermath.

The heirlooms of our marriage include three children who
don’t share my intention of divorcing you.
They need a proper father and you’re the only one
licensed to address them as daughter and as son.

On the heirloom ring you gave me on our wedding night,
the chimera of your family crest really wasn’t quite
appropriate, though made of gold polished shiny bright,
An ass head on a serpent’s body would have got it right!

 

Prompt words today are apparent, replaceable, aftermath, chimera, proper and heirloom.