Category Archives: Humor

Cleanup Crew for SOCS

Not dead..just stuffed full and taking a rest.

Cleanup Crew

They eke their living out of our scraps
purloined while we are taking naps
or out for walks or just aren’t looking––
so intent upon our cooking
that we fail to see them scamper
(from where they hide behind the hamper)
out to gather crumbs they seek.
But instead, they prompt an “Eek”
as Mom goes one way, they the other
off to find, they hope, another
kitchen where the cook’s more willing
to ignore their needs for filling
rodent jaws and rodent tummies
with some errant human yummies.

The SOCS prompt is eek/eke

“Wordless” for Word of the Day.

Wordless

I wish that I could wow you with putting prompts to rhyme,
but I seem not to be able to do so at this time.
“Amplify’s” been silenced and refuses to fight back,
while its potential author is revealed as just a hack.

It seems my old acuity at making words behave
has somehow deserted me, branding me a knave.
The truth that I am lacking in *vocabular agility
has left me slightly flummoxed with a new vulnerability.

(*For all I know, some lexicographer’s already dissed
my coinage of a brand new word the dictionaries missed.)
This poet, once ferocious, has been worn down by time.
and I’m thinking in my next life I might come back as a mime.

The Word of the Day prompt is:  “Amplify.”

“Dental Discourse” for Word of the Day

Dental Discourse

 

Dental Discourse

She could not stand the sad sad sight
of his horrendous overbite.
She arranged to take him to a
dentist, thinking he could do a
makeover.

She asked the doc what he would charge
to make his overhang less large.
The price he set to make each tooth less
was, I fear, greedy and ruthless
overkill.

Thus began their drawn-out dicker
that I think would have gone quicker
if his teeth had been less icky,
and the job a much less tricky
overhaul.

After much talk, they struck a deal,
both thinking that they’d made a steal.
But then with little else to do,
she said  if he attempted to
overcharge,

she would have his license lifted
no matter how bloody gifted
he might have been (when this all ends)
at cutting down her toothy friend’s
hangover.

 

The “Compound Word” verse form  consists of 5  five-line stanzas with aabb rhyme schemes, each containing 8 syllables and each stanza concluding with a three-syllable compound word that has one element the same as all other compound words in the final lines of the stanzas. Phew!

The Word of the Day prompt was Dentist.

For Fibbing Friday, Sep 19, 2025

I almost forgot Fibbing Friday!!! Here is the task at hand: Define the following:

1. Oxymoron: A dumb bovine
2. Ooky: Blown away with awe
3. Oodleplex: A conglomeration of apartment buildings
4. Obfuscate: To instruct one’s potential boyfriend on the advantages of “us” over “I.”
5. Obstreperous: Bad behavior of a woman while giving birth in the obstetric ward.
6. Oddsock: The stocking not lost to the dryer.
7. Orzo: What you paddle a canoezo with. 
8. Onomatopoeia: What to answer to your mom when she asks you if you are sneaking out. the back door to meet your boyfriend.  ( only of help if you have an outhouse.)
9. Oodles: What to call noodles after the first bite.
10. Oompah: Warning you utter to your boyfriend when your father finds you sneaking out with him at night.

 

 

Minds Like Mine, for The Sunday Whirl, Sept 14, 2025

Minds
like mine
are bound to
slip away into the
swells, blown away
through cracks in time
to  where a poem dwells.
Fans of verse   may lure me
into sitting on a  fence picking
bones of words that together make
no sense. I sort them into towers, then
grasp more words to  build trapped words
in frosted pyramids with messages well-chilled.

The Sunday Whirl words are: bound slip swells fan luring fence cracks bone tower frosted trap grasps

The photo, taken by me, is of a snow-covered venting volcano.

Inedibles

The Indigestibles

No room for mushrooms, can’t live with liver.
The thought of brains just makes me shiver.
Though I like pizza, my other law
is I don’t eat tomatoes raw!

Drinking milk’s against my wishes.
Fish is simply for the fishes.
I eat no veal or other baby,
and steak for me is simply “maybe.”

So if it’s your plan to invest
in things that I like to ingest,
I won’t make it any harder
for you to come and stock my larder.

All else you want to bring to feed me—
what edibles you wish to cede me:
Injera, curries, Thai, Chinese—
all are sure to tempt and please.

Except for one thing I just thought of
that in the past I’ve had a lot of.
There’s one more mouthful I won’t try.
I have no taste for humble pie!

For RDP, the prompt word is Mushroom.

Panto-Mimes, For Fibbing Friday, Sept 12, 2025

For Fibbing Friday, the task at hand is: These are characters in pantos or animated movies, but who would you nominate for the role (fictitious or real person)/

Note: Because I had never heard of Pantos before, I am going to write a description of what characters I can find on the Internet before I cast the role.

1. Widow Twanky.  (Male) A traditional pantomime dame. She has a reputation of being a strict mother but neither son takes her that seriously. She runs the town launderette and is always complaining about being overworked but really she does very little. She speaks loudly and dresses the same way): D0NALD TRUMP
2. Buttons. (He is typically a male servant of the household):  DAN SCAVINO –Trump’s former golf  caddy (really), now deputy head of staff at the Whitehouse.
3. Cinders. (She  dreams of attending the royal ball and marries the prince):  MELANIA TRUMP
4. The Beast. DONALD TRUMP
5. Gru. (The main character of Despicable Me.): DONALD TRUMP
6. Cruella de Vil KRISTI NOEM
7. The Fairy Godmother RICHARD GRENELL  presidential envoy for special missions since 2025.
8. Abanazar. (the primary villain, an evil sorcerer, in the traditional British pantomime version of Aladdin. He poses as Aladdin’s uncle to trick him into retrieving a magic lamp):  ELON MUSK
9. Carabosse ( The wicked antagonist): PUTIN
10. King/Queen Rat.  DONALD TRUMP AND MELANIA

Mr. Trump is such a fine actor that I had to cast him in a number of roles. Pretender to all, master of none.

 

“Deer Ones”

Arising early, I stumbled upon this poem, Table for One, Please” by Bartholomew Barker. That led to reading more of his poems, including THIS ONE at BeatnikCowboy.com. Have a look at it, but please come back to hear my reply. I was so impressed that he knew a herd of deer could be called a “parcel,” but then it occurred to me that perhaps he was just being poetically inventive, so I had to research the matter and in doing so, found this list of synonyms for “herd,” as it applies to deer:

In most situations, you can refer to a group of animals like deer simply as a “herd”. A herd of deer is probably the most common way to designate them, but it is most assuredly the most boring. To be more deer-specific, the other ways to refer to a group of deer include a bevy, a rangale, a bunch, or a parcel. When using parcel, however, it’s generally going to refer to a group of only young deer.

And that new knowledge led, unfortunately, to this hair-splitting and corny rhymed poem on my part:

Deer Ones

A “herd” is most commonly what you will hear
folks  calling a grouping of two or more deer;
but if you’re a poet in need of a rhyme,
perhaps you’ll use “bevy” some of the time.
Which is just as correct, though granted, more rare
to describe groups of deer that are more than a pair.
But if you need a rhyme for deer in a dale,
you just might prefer to use a “rangale,”
which is also proper—or perhaps a “bunch,”
to label a deer herd gathered for lunch
in field or in forest, munching on leaves
or grass, twigs or acorns—or crops left when sieves
abandon their fields of soybeans or corn
leaving some crops abandoned, forlorn.
But if you use “parcel” to call deer among
deer of their ilk—that’s just deer who are young!

Lethologica

I can never remember this word, so I think I am going to have it tattooed on my palm so I can remember my excuse for not remembering!!!!! (In case you don’t read comments, I just received these words of wisdom from my sister, who obviously remembers her Greek mythology better than I do: Lethe was the river of forgetfulness in Greek mythology. Thanks, Sis!!

“Acorn” for MVB, Sept 7, 2025

When I saw this prompt, I just had to reblog this blog of mine from 2018. It was too perfect.

Mystery Solved

My friend Larry Kolczak has allowed me to copy this hilarious email sent to me.  I’ve been trying to convince him he should have a blog himself. Do you agree?

FullSizeRender
Six months ago, we hung these beaded curtains on our second-floor patio fence to obscure the view into the neighboring lot.  Recently, …

 

img_8689.jpg
… we started finding broken strands.  We figured it was because the curtains weren’t made for outdoor use, and that sun and wind had deteriorated the nylon strings.  But, that wasn’t the problem…

IMG_8687
It turns out that many of the eco-friendly beads are acorns.

 

FullSizeRender-1
Guess who noticed?

FullSizeRender-2
He nips the string to get the uppermost acorn…

FullSizeRender-3
… which he either eats on the spot, or buries in our potted plants, and leaves us with the…

 

IMG_8724
…collateral damage.

Go HERE to find Larry’s monthly articles in El Ojo del Lago.

MVB‘s Prompt is Acorn.