Tag Archives: Humor

Southern Expressions That Will Crack You Up!

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Okay, this goes so well with my earlier post of Southern Discomfort that I have to reblog it. Thanks, Joyfultobeeblogs for bringing it to my attention.

joyful2beeblogs

I saw this video today and have to share it. Not all Southern women are the same but these ladies are saying a lot of the expressions I have heard from Louisiana to North Carolina. We don’t all talk like these women but most of us have used some of their expressions in our life. This and other videos of the same name were first shown on the Southern Women Channel. I just wanted to share them with you.

You will laugh!

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No Head for Business

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IMG_0436

No Head for Business

I fear I must be adamant in stating my demands.
In this I am unshakeable. My initial sales price stands.
I do not like this bargaining. I find it all a chore.
I’d rather be off wandering. Business is a bore.
And though I must admit that your demeanor is most affable,
your offer is too little. In fact I find it laughable.
It will do no good to counter offer. I’m set on the price
that would reimburse me for leaving paradise.

I have no bottom offer. This is no power game.
To nickel and to dime it is a practice I find lame.
The palm trees are all swaying, there’s hot water in the pool,
and the more I think about it, I see that I’m a fool
to leave this little Shangri-la. Where would I find its sequel?
It’s clear that for the price I ask I could not find its equal!
Here swinging in my hammock with a cocktail and my pup,
I am so contented that my sales price just went up!!

Prompt words today were chore, affable, adamant and power.

https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/01/18/rdp-friday-chore/
https://fivedotoh.com/2019/01/18/fowc-with-fandango-affable/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2019/01/18/your-daily-word-prompt-adamant-january-18-2019/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2019/01/18/power/

Coterie

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Coterie

Are you in my coterie or am I in thine?
I’d find it much more stimulating if you were in mine.
If I’m the leader of the pack, the one who’s picked to shine,
I admit, my friend, that I would find it most divine.

When folks pulled out their cameras, I would stand in the center.
At every social gathering, I’d be the first to enter.
I’d be the first to order when our group went out to dine.
I’d have  prime place at table. I’d get to choose the wine.

It would become tradition that I would be the star.
All the handsomest of men would eye me from afar.
But after this conjecturing, of course I could be wrong.
If I am in your coterie, I’d only tag along!

 

The prompt words today are coterie (love that word,) camera, stimulating and tradition. Here are the links:
https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2018/12/12/rdp-wednesday-coterie/
https://fivedotoh.com/2018/12/12/fowc-with-fandango-camera/
https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2018/12/12/stimulating/
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/12/12/your-daily-word-prompt-tradition-December-12-2018/

 

Happiness???

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A few days ago I wrote a poem on my blog entitled “Black Friday.”  This creative animated film by Steve Cutts so perfectly illustrates it that I had to share it with you. Really inventive and indicative of our modern world.

 

New Roommate, Chapter 1

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New Roommate, Chapter 1

I hope I’ll be forgiven if I’m driven to impose
and point out that the place that you have chosen for repose
is on my bed, not yours, and on my freshly laundered clothes!
You’ve drooled on my new-pressed jeans and snagged my finest hose
and that’s my favorite blouse there beneath your dripping nose,
and though you look most comfortable in that snuggling pose,
I fear you and your boyfriend I simply must depose.
Is it possible to move to your own bed, do you suppose?

(See Chapter 2 HERE.)

The prompt for today was “impose.” Here is the link:
https://fivedotoh.com/2018/11/17/fowc-with-fandango-impose/

 

Which Way? (D.P.S.*)

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D.P.S.*

Please click on first photo below to enlarge all the photos and read the poem that is presented as their captions.

When I am home, I am up on a shelf, high up in the air, and all by myself,
but when they go traveling, I go along so I can help out telling  right way from wrong.
How far are we going?
Where have we been?
This a way.
That a way. Nine miles or ten?
Which way should I face to tell where we’re going? Which way is best to be in the knowing?
How can I help you down here in this hole? Vacationing backwards is not my main goal.
I know I’ll do better up here on the dash. 
I’ve room to spread out ‘cuz it’s less of a mash.
Should I face forward, or should I face back?

Should I inform with a wing or a quack?
Should we go left or should we go right?

It is a good thing that I’m here within sight
‘cuz Mom’s only looking at trees and at barns.

Clicking her camera and spinning her yarns.
She thinks that she’s helping me plan this excursion, 


but in fact she is simply creating diversion!
In the end, I get them to where they are going in spite of the raining. In spite of the snowing.
And I’m glad I could add to my folks’ education by guiding them through their southern migration.

*Duck Positioning System

https://sonofabeach96.com/2018/11/08/which-way-challenge-november-8-2018/